VANCOUVER’S CLAIM TO FAME
“Being beautiful, yet retardedly unlivable”,
“D.O.A. 1978–82”,
“It’s the only place where an apartment the size of a garden shed costs more than a Maserati”,
“Portraying other cities in direct-to-video schlockbusters”,
“Sex, drugs, and predictable rock ’n’ roll”

1. Scenery/beauty/mountains and ocean
2. Stanley Park
3. The weather

VANCOUVER’S CLAIM TO SHAME
“Beggars on every street corner downtown”,
“Granville Street after dark—keep the little punks at home”,
“Turning lousy mayors into lousy premiers”,
“Nickelback”

1. Downtown Eastside
2. Rampant homelessness
3. 2010 Olympics (tie)
   The rain (tie)

WASHROOM TO SPOT A CELEBRITY
“I try not to look”,
“Spot? Like, in a workout sense?”
“That SeaBus washroom is pretty classy”

1. Elixir at Opus Vancouver Hotel
     350 Davie Street
2. CinCin Ristorante
     1154 Robson Street
3. Sutton Place Hotel
     845 Burrard Street

ENVIRONMENTALLY RESPONSIBLE LOCAL COMPANY
“BC Hydro—they work in the dark”,
“The independent contractors who remove the pop cans from the garbage”

1. Vancity
     Various locations
2. Capers Community Market
     Various locations
3. Mountain Equipment Co-op
     130 West Broadway
      1341 Main Street, North Vancouver

LOCAL EMPLOYER TO WORK FOR
One vote for McDonalds

1. Vancity
     Various locations
2. Electronic Arts
     4330 Sanderson Way, Burnaby
3. UBC
     2329 West Mall

RIDE SHARE PROGRAM
“Car-jacking a big SUV”

1. Cooperative Auto Network
     205–470 Granville Street
2. Jack Bell Ride-Share
     700 West 57th Avenue
3. Zipcar
     280–601 West Cordova

BUS ROUTE WITH THE HAPPIEST RIDERS
“I’m almost certain that I’ve never seen happy bus riders”,
“None of them. Bus riders hate the bus”,
“What? Happy riders in Vancouver? I’d believe in the tooth fairy first.”

1. #22 MacDonald
2. #99 B-Line UBC
3. #98 B-Line Airport

LOCAL HERO
“William Gibson/Susan Mendelson—it’s a tie (a great read and good cheesecake)”,
“He’d rather remain anonymous and go about his work quietly”

1. Rick Hansen
2. Trevor Linden
3. Terry Fox

VANCOUVERITE CLOSEST TO HELL
“A nemesis who shall remain nameless”,
“My ex-girlfriend”¦or maybe me—depends on my mood”,
“My pompous coworker”,
“Probably those guys digging the RAV tunnel, proximitywise”,
“Even though he’s been a little more under the radar this year, Gordon Campbell is still driving the express bus to hell”

1. Sam Sullivan
2. Gordon Campbell
3. Robert Pickton

YEAR’S DUMBEST POLITICAL MOVE
“Denying anything that’s obviously a problem”

1. Allowing the civic strike
2. Sam Sullivan commenting to the media about the strike
3. MLA pay raises

POLITICIAN
“Don’t you mean least worst?”
“Have any moved here lately?”

1. Sam Sullivan
2. Libby Davies
3. Spencer Herbert

LOCAL SCANDAL THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA TRIED TO IGNORE OR COVER UP
“The decimation of Cambie Street merchants and the Canada Line boondoggle in general”

1. Olympic cost overruns
2. The collapse of businesses on Cambie Street because of the Canada Line construction
3. David Emerson switching parties

OUTRAGEOUS OLYMPIC COST OVERRUN
“Having to make all that snow in 2010”,
“The social-housing infrastructure—oh wait, never mind”, and this plaintive taxpayer plea: “Isn’t it on time, on budget?”

1. Canada Line
2. Vancouver Convention Centre
     200–999 Canada Place
3. Sea to Sky highway upgrade

VANCOUVER SECRET
“A free parking space”¦but I’m not telling where”,
“Everyone in Kits is heavily in debt to maintain their lifestyle”,
“First World city with Third World problems”,
“It would be a bad move to answer this question”,
“More crime than Moscow, more junkies than Hong Kong”,
“The Army and Navy legion on Main Street’s karaoke night. It’s a living David Lynch movie”

1. Terminal City Rollergirls
2. Wreck Beach
3. Lynn Canyon Park
     3663 Park Road, North Vancouver

PLACE TO WATCH THE SUNSET
“Crab Park. The locals love to sit and chat with you whether you like it or not”

1. English Bay
2. Kits Beach
3. Wreck Beach

PLACE WHEN IT’S RAINING
Pacific Spirit Park and Pacific Centre Mall ended up pretty much tied—perhaps because they’re so similar

1. Home
2. Any coffee shop
3. Outside (staying in is letting the rain win)

NEIGHBOURHOOD
“Count the black/silver VW Jettas—the one with the fewest”,
“Gastown: character, charm, dignity—and bums!”
“Marpole (actually it sucks but I wanna attract some cool people)”

1. Kitsilano
2. Commercial Drive
3. Mount Pleasant (tie)
   West End (tie)

EXCUSE TO GOOF OFF
“Because I’m not getting a cut of the profits”

1. Sunny day/It’s not raining
2. It’s raining
3. There’s snow in the mountains

PLACE TO SMOKE A JOINT IN PUBLIC
“As far away from me as possible, thanks”,
“Seemingly, any construction site”,
“I don’t think Vancouverites tend to discriminate”,
“Under or beside a No Smoking sign”,
“Why do people do that here? It’s annoying!”

1. The beach
2. Vancouver Art Gallery steps
      750 Hornby Street
3. Anywhere