Today (March 14), the Vancouver Airport Authority issued a media release announcing that VANOC has named Vancouver International Airport the "official airport" for the 2010 Winter Olympics.

Straight editor Martin Dunphy wrote a mock-response to the release:

A spokesperson for Toronto Pearson International Airport today expressed disappointment at the selection of Vancouver International Airport as the official airport for the 2010 Winter Olympic Games. The choice by the Vancouver Organizing Committee for the 2010 Olympic and Paralympic Winter Games (VANOC) was motivated by bias, the spokesperson said. "Most of the people on VANOC who decided on Vancouver actually reside in Vancouver," John Leaffan said. "We think Toronto didn't get a fair shake simply because we are a few thousand miles east of Vancouver."

Leaffan also said Vancouver's facilities are inferior to those of Toronto. "We have miles of moving sidewalks and way more cabs and buses, and we are strategically sited to provide convenient access to connecting flights for Olympics visitors."

VANOC CEO John Furlong said Vancouver was the logical choice. "Vancouver was the logical choice," he said. Questioned further, Furlong said Vancouver had more to offer international visitors. "If you arrive here after a long flight from overseas, and you are hungry, thirsty, tired, and maybe don't speak the language, we are pleased to be able to offer security personnel with the latest in Taser technology," he said, adding: "There's nothing like a quick, long nap after a long flight."