Starring Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers.

I know it isn’t fair, but as a music reviewer, sometimes I can’t help but frown on my 10-year-old daughter’s taste in music; her current CD collection is geared toward Disney-manufactured pop stars like Hilary Duff, the Cheetah Girls, and Hannah Montana (aka Miley Cyrus). I feel especially sorry for Tess when I recall how, when I was her age, the Beatles released Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.

Trapped in an iPod-less existence, I’d spend countless hours sprawled on my parents’ living room rug, listening to the vinyl record on their console stereo, poring over the album art, and memorizing every song—except “Within You Without You”, which I couldn’t stand. (I was an opinionated bugger even then.)

My concerns about Tess’s infatuation with TV–spawned superstars were mitigated somewhat after taking her to the new Miley Cyrus 3-D concert film, which is like a U2 3D for tweens. It follows the teenage Cyrus on her sold-out Best of Both Worlds tour of 2007, which was so in-demand that fathers would race one another in parking lots, wearing ladies’ shoes, hoping to win tickets for their charges (and often painfully wiping out). Turns out their high-heeled heroics were not in vain, as the offspring of that “Achy Breaky Heart” guy proves to be not just an electrifying child performer but a gifted singer-songwriter to boot.

You have to suffer through the plastic Disney vibe of her Hannah Montana persona to get to that realization, though, and endure a numbing batch of mediocre power-pop tunes (plus those smarmy Jonas Brothers). But once Cyrus makes the mid-concert hair and costume change from her Montana character, her genuine talent filters through. None of the show’s nifty 3-D effects—including drumsticks and guitar picks that come hurtling toward you—are as memorable as her heart-tugging performance of “I Miss You”, her ode to a beloved granddad taken by cancer.

Cripes, taking kids to movies really brings out your inner wuss.