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The Captain and Tennille: "Muskrat Love"

By John Lucas

There are some things that are legendary for their awfulness, and this song is definitely one of them. Oddly enough, however, despite having heard about it for most of my life, I had never actually heard the song until today.

My verdict is that it's not actually that bad. Fairly innocuous, actually. Someone must have liked it, because this isn't even the original version (Willis Alan Ramsey, who wrote it, recorded it in 1972, and America recorded its version in 1973). The visual effects in this clip, on the other hand, fall somewhere short of competence.

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Tenille's haircut compounds the visual effects, wouldn't you say?

Prepare to lose your lunch:

I watched it with the sound off and found it deeply disturbing. And not just because of Tenille's hair.

Apparently, they're still around. I guess love kept them together.



Tennille seems excessively happy. But you can't really hear that piano she's furiously pounding on. And notice how clear their voices are even though they aren't singing into microphones?

Her hair isn't nearly so scary this time around. The teeth have taken over.

The backup singer in the blue dress has the exact same hair as Tenille. That's pretty awesome. And do you think the Captain wore that hideous yachting cap to cover a bald spot?

I'm really getting into these guys!

Her hair is quite different now. Sadly, it's actually worse: www.tonitennille.net/.

In my kindergarten class photo, there's a girl that has the exact same "Muskrat Love" Tenille 'do. But it's forgivable on a child. Not so on a grown woman. Especially one singing about fornicating rodents.

Here's a side of the Captain and Tennille I never thought I'd see. I almost hate to say it, but damn that is one fine set of gams! And the Captain's mustache is pretty hot stuff too.

Hubba hubba. The legs aren't bad, either.

I can't tell if you're just kidding or if you actually don't know what the word "gams" means.