The B.C. government’s speech from the throne included numerous pledges, which will likely form the basis of the Liberal reelection campaign.

These speeches are often fuzzy, leaving the public to wonder what the government really means.

Part of the problem is that the Lieutenant-Governor delivers the  words on behalf of the government.  Premier Gordon Campbell is really playing the role of Edgar Bergen to Lieut.-Gov. Steven Point's Charlie McCarthy.

For fun, I've decided to offer interpretations of what  Campbell might have really meant on  six occasions when Point mouthed his words.  

1. What Point said: “Now is not the time to impose hundreds of millions in new costs on small businesses through an increased minimum wage that will mean more job losses, will depress job creation and will hurt those it purports to help.”

What Campbell might have meant: “I’m not going to lift a finger for  those low-wage schleps who’ve seen their transit and housing costs skyrocket in recent years. Only losers  earn the  minimum wage.”

2. What Point said: “A new law school will be opened at Thompson Rivers University in Kamloops in collaboration with the University of Calgary.”

What Campbell might have meant: “I will do almost anything to ensure that my most loyal MLA, Kevin Krueger, retains Kamloops in the 2009 election. Even if it means hooking up with a kooky, right-wing Alberta university to deliver a law degree that should more appropriately be offered by Simon Fraser University.”

3. What Point said: “In the year ahead, a new voluntary, defined contribution pension plan will be established to help those who currently have no pension plan.”

What Campbell might have  meant: “My friend and large campaign contributor Peter Brown's company, Canaccord, just lost $62 million in the last quarter. It’s a mess. Somebody has to save those brokers’ jobs. Let them place orders for investments in the new pension plan, and those upscale restaurants in downtown Vancouver will stay open a little longer. Who cares if Canaccord invests the workers'  nest eggs  in collateralized debt obligations from its treasury? Hey, Canaccord has done a decent job  managing my investment porfolio.”

4. What Point said: “Our government will work with the Union of British Columbia Municipalities to develop new legislation over the summer, for introduction early next year, that will protect provincial tax reductions. All levels of government must be equally disciplined to ensure that tax reductions at one level of government are not negated by tax increases at another.”

What Campbell might have meant: “Left-wing local governments will not be allowed to raise more money to provide social services to deal with problems in areas of provincial responsibility that my government refuses to address.”

5. What Point said: “This government is working with First Nations to develop a Recognition and Reconciliation Act that will establish a new statutory framework to further the implementation of the New Relationship. It will acknowledge, and place in a provincial statutory context, that Indigenous people have long lived throughout British Columbia and that this fact does not require proof.”

What Campbell might have meant: “First Nations leaders think I misled them before the 2005 election when I spoke of a new relationship. First Nations can swing some seats in B.C., so this time, they want me to put it in writing.”

6. What Point said: “They are building the new Royal Jubilee Hospital in Victoria, and new and expanded hospitals in Vernon, Kelowna and Fort St. John. They will build the new Northern Cancer Centre in Prince George and the new BC Children's Hospital.”

What Campbell might have  meant: “The new Children’s Hospital will be a public-private partnership, even though several research papers published in the British Medical Journal clearly demonstrate that this approach delivers significantly  less value over the long term to taxpayers. I don’t care about what the research says in the British Medical Journal. And you know what? Neither do most of the media, so I probably won't lose any votes over this one."