Starring Noah Ringer and Dev Patel. Rated PG.

The Last Airbender is about a bald-headed little kid who can manipulate air and water by using a whole bunch of tai chi–type moves. Aang (Noah Ringer) has been raised by monks to use his extraordinary powers in the service of peaceful co-existence. The problem? His once harmonious world has been overtaken by a bunch of evil firebenders, greedy guys who—blessed with the ability to control fire—have the power to barbecue their enemies faster than a smoking hibachi. Only Aang has the means to stop them.

Based on Nickelodeon’s popular animated series, writer-director M. Night Shyamalan serves up a high-budget mix of lowbrow clichés. While he may be aiming for The Lord of the Rings , the result is much closer to a watered-down version of the old Kung Fu TV show. Remember how Kung Fu used to heap on the fortune-cookie philosophy as penance for the guilty pleasure of watching some drunken bully get kicked in the nuts? Well, Shyamalan gives us all the pretentious rhetoric with none of the down-and-dirty payoff. Here, the bad guys get magically frozen in straitjackets made of ice.

It’s hard to figure out why The Last Airbender was shot in 3-D. You get a lot of churning water, dancing flames, and swirling dirt, juxtaposed with geeky-looking soldiers running around in Flash Gordon –era helmets. So what? With the exception of Ringer and Slumdog Millionaire ’s Dev Patel—who delivers a touching performance as the film’s misunderstood villain—most of the cast appears to be sleepwalking. Teenage girls who fork over their allowance to get an eyeful of Twilight hunk Jackson Rathbone will be disappointed that he spends most of the movie in a fur parka.

While frustratingly tentative, the final scene is arrogant enough to promise a sequel. You’ve been warned.