It’s Snowing on Saltspring doesn't work

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      By Nicola Cavendish. Directed by Lois Anderson. An Arts Club production. At the Granville Island Stage, on Thursday, December 5. Continues until December 28

      I suppose we can always be optimistic and hope that the Arts Club will never produce It’s Snowing on Saltspring again.

      First performed in 1985, Nicola Cavendish’s script is about Bill Bannister, a disenchanted dentist who lives on Salt Spring Island—or Saltspring, as this show would have it—with Sarah, his overdue, pregnant wife. Bill’s mom and dad split up violently at Christmas when he was a kid, so he’s seasonally grumpy and generally freaked out about commitment. Then Santa shows up and takes him to the North Pole, and you can figure out the rest.

      There’s a slapdash wackiness and sentimentality about the script that, in the past, have sometimes made the show fun and even moving, in fits and starts. When Cavendish played the role, for instance, Bernice Snarpley, the island’s lesbian real-estate agent, was a fountain of outrageous eccentricity and heartache.

      But, in other hands, Cavendish’s sensibility emerges as an unsettling combination of mawkishness and vulgarity. In a passage that tugs unsuccessfully at the heartstrings, everybody sits around and sings a little Christmas hymn, for instance. But there’s also a big chunk about Santa’s elves farting. And Sarah’s friend Martha tells a pointless joke about a man with five penises: “His pants fit like a glove.” It’s not that this material’s offensive; it’s just sophomoric.

      Partly because director Lois Anderson’s production lacks the freewheeling, let’s-see-what-we-can-get-away-with, Christmas panto vibe, the script’s many flaws don’t come close to being forgivable. The folks at the North Pole, for instance, speak in execrable doggerel. Even Bill succumbs. Adding further redundancy to an already obvious notion, he chimes: “I guess you could say that I’m running away/Not facing the things I avoid every day.” At least that couplet scans.

      In the talented cast, Beatrice Zeilinger tries to bring some dignity to Bernice, but the results are disappointingly subdued. Joel Wirkkunen has fun as Santa. And Andrew McNee, who plays Bill, is a terrific comic actor: he captures the character’s essential innocence and he contributes some inventive physical business.

      Not even this company can make the material work, however. It’s Snowing on Saltspring is old and very, very tired. It’s time to shoot it.

      Comments

      13 Comments

      thanks colin

      Dec 6, 2013 at 3:41pm

      nice to see this production get the review it deserves. would be nice to see the same even handedness with other artsclub reviews. production quality is one thing, but entertainment value is what audiences are looking for. this show is a lame duck and is easy to "shoot" for audiences and critics alike.

      Rf

      Dec 7, 2013 at 7:57pm

      It's so utterly boring and uninteresting. I don't understand why local theatre companies put stuff like this on and then wonder why they go bankrupt.

      Hazlit

      Dec 8, 2013 at 9:04am

      And what's up with all the seasonally appropriate entertainment? Can't theatre companies leave Christmas to the elves? What about some ancient Greek drama (played straight) instead. That might wake us up!

      Magic Duck

      Dec 8, 2013 at 12:33pm

      Here's the thing Rf: The Arts Club probably doesn't go bankrupt BECAUSE they produce this mediocre holiday entertainment. The night we went the place was practically sold out. It's a money maker. So is Mary Poppins. So was White Christmas. The last show we saw there (the excellent Venus In Fur) wasn't even half full. Arts Club is catering to a demand. And Vancouverites are lining up around the block, voting with their dollars, and what are they saying?

      "I only see one show a year and I'll be damned if it's going to be something thought provoking or insightful! I want to take the whole family to terrible seasonal entertainment!"

      I don't think it's fair to simply blame the Arts Club for producing this doggrel. What about the consumers? The fly-by-night theatre-goer who thinks Snowing on Saltspring is culture? Sadly, in this town, Snowing On Saltspring will probably beat Oedipus every time, hands down. And you can't blame the Arts Club for that.

      Yikes

      Dec 8, 2013 at 3:49pm

      Oh, this show was dismal. Great actors, horrid script. But Magic Duck, I would say it's possible to produce a holiday show that isn't as tasteless as this. I saw It's a Wonderful Life in its second year and I was delighted. Wonderful actors, touching show (I don't even like the movie and I was sniffling), outstanding production value, deserved its sold-out houses. I say, give the masses the holiday show that they want, but make it beautiful.

      Hazlit

      Dec 8, 2013 at 4:41pm

      @Magic Duck,

      An incisive analysis, sadly. I hope it isn't pissing into the wind to wonder what would it take for some larger proportion of Vancouver audiences to reject the doggerel and embrace Oedipus.

      doesn't work

      Dec 9, 2013 at 1:13pm

      just went from Bad to Worse. I thought productions shows (local) would be entertaining in this town, Boy was I wrong. Vancouver is not the place. its sad to say, but true.

      Marlon

      Dec 9, 2013 at 2:03pm

      To "doesn't work" (and everyone):
      Please, PLEASE don't take a single production by the Arts Club as an indication of the quality of culture in this town. They are just one voice. This show does not exemplify the character of the arts in our community. (it would be like watching a single episode of "Big Bang Theory" and concluding "Man, TV sucks these days"). The Arts Club will do well with this show. But the "Big Bang Theory" also does well. Does not mean it's good or that there are no other options.
      And it certainly is NOT an accurate reading of the arts temperature in this town

      Hazlit

      Dec 9, 2013 at 3:58pm

      To Marlon et. al.

      A quick search of the NYT theatre listings confirms around 250 (Off Broadway only) shows happening right now. As a generous estimate NYC has 20 million people, or is roughly ten times the size of Metro Vancouver. Right now the Straight lists 12 theatre shows, or fewer than half of what NYC has proportionally.

      Visual Art in this town is also shameful. It is nearly ALL Jeff Wall, Emily Carr and First Nations carving. What happened to global art from around the world? Did you know that the musuem of ethnology in Berlin has a better collection of BC art than BC does?

      Have you seen what Boston can do culturally with a city of roughly the same size? Where are the millionaires in Vancouver who want to buy culture with their millions?

      Vancouver culture sucks! It is a paradise for philistines.

      Shawn

      Dec 10, 2013 at 5:21pm

      Hazlit: I was just in NY. There are not 250 shows playing. Broadwaybox currently lists only 157, and some of those are pre-sales for shows opening in the spring like the If/Then. Of the off-Broadway shows most are complete shit. It was a stretch to pick 10 new shows that I wanted to see (I avoided long runners like Chicago) and even then I ended up sitting through a couple crappy productions (avoid Ethan Hawke as Macbeth!!). So don't go off on how great NY is. Yes the great theatre there is stupendous (Patina Miller in Pippin = genius + life changing) but there's more misses than hits. Considering the small number of productions we have in Vancouver we are lucky that so many are so good. Did you see the wonderful UBC student production of Pride and Prejudice? As good as Broadway for my dollars - better! since it was only $22 instead of $120! How about Vancouver Opera's Albert Herring? Gorgeous set and great singing. Before you shit all over the arts in Vancouver, I wonder how much you actually have even bothered to see?