Lance Armstrong used what now?

When you're a writer/journalist/monkey using a typewriter, errant typos comprise at least 66 percent of your daily chuckles. Which is why we're loving this breaking news from the CBC.

I have so many questions like...

What colour rugs?

Did they really tie the room together?

Is the World Anti-Doping Agency concerned over whether these were performance-enhancing rugs, i.e. flying carpets?

And is there any credence to the rumour that I am starting right now that he once rolled a crusty old dean up in a rug and attempted to throw him off a bridge?

The inquiring public wants to know!