Is this man’s penis too small?

The issue of dick size gets the long needed documentary treatment with Patrick Moote’s Unhung Hero.

Moote became a Star Wars Kid-sized Internet meme when he proposed to his fiancé on the Jumbotron at a UCLA basketball game and she fled in horror.

She later explained that his economy travel-sized dink was a deal breaker. 

Moote subsequently took his camera on the road for a pan-global look at the world of cock. His much buzzed-over film is the result.

In interviews, Moote—who reveals that he falls below the average five-and-a-half inches erect—says the issue of size works out “to about 50-50”.

In a casual poll conducted by the Straight earlier this morning, however, I was told, “Of course size is important, Twinkerbell.” Which is a lovely way to talk in front of the kids.

Anyway, Unhung Hero might reach its own conclusions, but as any good sex therapist will tell you, the most important sex organ of all isn’t the one between your legs.

It’s the anus.