Mike Usinger plays delicious game of peek-a-boo

by Adrian Mack on September 10th, 2014 at 5:02 PM

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At Rogers Arena on Tuesday (September 9)

With his increasingly rare live appearances in Vancouver, an air of expectation hung over Straight music chief Mike Usinger’s performance at Katy Perry's concert at Rogers Arena last night (September 9). And this most unpredictable of critics wasted no time in toying with fans.

Even at an impressive 6”4’ and sporting one of the largest heads that ever struggled its way through a Stanfield crewneck, Usinger managed to frequently disappear inside an ocean of rainbow-dyed jailbait. “Where the Dickens did he go?” we thought, after spotting and then losing sight again of that huge melon from some six rows behind. A delicious game of peek-a-boo ensued.

Despite the phantasmagoric display of dayglo boobs, thighs, and ancient Egyptian Tron characters enacting their Thelemic ritual onstage, it was Usinger who exerted the strangest and most powerful fascination, playing out this tense artist-consumer relationship with the seasoned aplomb of a career hack, and finally appearing on the Jumbotron at precisely the moment that an enormous inflatable taco made its way through Rogers Arena.

It had “Katy’s Taco” stamped on the side, and Usinger’s expression—a combination of mute wonder mingled with the blank stare of an aroused alcoholic—provided the payload fans were waiting for.

It was a late career highlight for those of us who remember watching Usinger reviews shows back at the Starfish Room in the ‘90s, before infamy, self-abuse, and too many hockey balls to the noggin robbed him of his talent. Or so we thought. This was a stunning comeback, by any measure.

Comments

9 Comments

Mike Mann

Sep 10, 2014 at 5:35pm

i honestly couldn't read past the first paragraph. were we even at the same show? the writer of this piece is trying way too hard to be funny and clever and fails BIG TIME. why not send someone who isn't filled with contempt for mike usinger to review his performance? i'm not sure who that would be but this review is hate crime.

Mike Usinger

Sep 10, 2014 at 6:36pm

I don't wear Stanfield you fuck. I'm a Fruit of the Loom man.

I

Sep 10, 2014 at 8:58pm

have a crush on Mike Usinger. And you do, too, Adrian.

Great Article

Sep 10, 2014 at 11:01pm

Keep 'em coming. This is high-quality journalism. You all have grade degrees in journalism, right?

Jules X

Sep 11, 2014 at 2:49am

Whoever let Mike 'Lothario' Usinger into a Katy Perry concert wasn't doing their job.

Usinger is the Robert Crumb (or curmudgeonly lech of your choice) of reviewers. I'm not sure if that's good or bad, but it's a stone cold fact.

John Lucas

Sep 11, 2014 at 1:38pm

Mike Mann, see my Passenger review for a little insight into the Straight's rationale behind assigning concert reviews. I think you will enjoy it; it's really an excellent piece of journalism, and I would say so (albeit begrudgingly) even if someone other than me had written it.

Mike Mann

Sep 11, 2014 at 2:54pm

that was brilliant john. in your next one can you explain either: a) the rationale behind how concerts are selected to be reviewed, or b) the rationale why this site doesn't have threaded comments?

John Lucas

Sep 11, 2014 at 4:31pm

a) We review acts that Usinger deems noteworthy and that we didn't run a preview of in the previous week's issue. As for what constitutes noteworthy, I'm sure he'll be happy to explain that himself when he finally comes down from his "Katy's Taco" high.

b) What do you think this is, the New York Times?