Black bears are starting to think they run this place

Black bears have clearly had enough of us humans. Late last week we had the grisly tale of a black bear in Kamloops, who was found eating and guarding the corpse of a man later revealed to have been convicted murderer Rory Nelson.

That bear didn't fare any better than its last meal: it was promptly done away with by conservation officers despite the fact that it had just stumbled upon Watson's tasty body rather than dealt him any fatal blows.

Now CBC News tells us of another ursine miscreant in Whistler that over the weekend snuck up from behind and sucker punched a 55-year-old Coquitlam resident while he soaked in a hot tub. The victim in this case made it back to his house and called police, who tracked the offender 100 metres away and shot it. (No word on whether any tasers were involved.)

And this morning, CBC Radio One was reporting that SFU had issued a "bear warning" after a black bear and her cub had been spotted on Burnaby mountain.

Oh, and who can forget the bear that showed up at the Vancouver Christmas Market a few months ago? I'm not even sure black bears celebrate Christmas.

This is really starting to look like some deliberate action on the bears' part. Clearly, they think they've got something of a people problem.

Any chance of a truce or some sort of a peace accord being signed here? Could someone get a Black Bear Representative on the line? Because in a battle between 5-foot-2-inch me and a bear, I'm not really liking my odds.