Trevor at St. Augustine's
I convinced you, a vegan, to eat an entire plate of poutine after you'd consumed a mere 2 pints of ubiquitous local microbrew. What other crazy hijinks could I lure you into...
Here are a bunch of questions that were submitted anonymously at a live taping of Savage Lovecast.


My ex, who I'm still amicable with, is a post-Mensa brilliant, horny, obnoxious mindfuck of a human being who can drink 10 straight shots of Irish whiskey one minute, publicly dry-hump my leg the next, and then ignore me for the next half hour as he opens his laptop and finishes his legal brief for the next day. So why can't I just cut him off completely, you ask? I love his mind. He's a fabulous writer and satirist who can work the crudest forms into masterpieces. If he ever had a threesome with Trey Parker and Matt Stone, I think the universe might explode. I would love to work with him on a shared project in a controlled creative capacity - nothing too earnest, of course - in a way that makes me feel like a respected contributor. Not likely to happen this century, though. Time to move on.
Rating: 0
Having one life really sucks. I've tried so hard to live ethically and at the beginning it was easy. I somehow caught the attention of a gorgeous woman, and we dated for almost a decade. I never cheated despite temptations, and this was no small feat, as a rather average looking guy who continually seems to attract interesting and beautiful women. But I've still fallen for a few of these women, and now I feel stretched between the choice I made and the ones I could have.
Rating: -4
I think I need to break up with my girlfriend of five years, but I am completely and utterly ball-less. Why is the right thing to do always so effing hard?
Rating: +13
I'm really tired of the passive aggressive energy between us. I call, you don't answer. You call, when I have something I am doing. I liked you a lot once. Now, in 2015, I have given up. You can stay with your current ex/wife, and spoiled teenage son. I have had enough. Shit or get off the pot!
Rating: -8
I have an anxiety disorder and it is especially bad during this time of year. Panic attacks are worst. But the sedatives are fucking great.
Rating: +13
I work nights and I end up walking through crosstown and chinatown late at night. This week I've seen Santa puke twice, pee on a dumpster and fight several people. The tims and mcd's in crosstown (to any sober and rational person) are complete madness. Those poor freakin trainee kids. I watched one bill a drunk girl 15 bucks for a small box of timbits, which she paid. Hastings and skid row are literally safer and less completely batshit crazy, and they unleashed riverview into it and gave riverview crack! I love my shitty old apartment building and my shitty tiny grocery store that always lacks totally normal stuff like bread and sugar. Please mayor R-bomb save my neighborhood from the yuppies and bros who can't drink in theirs (because everything closes at 9)
Rating: -1
I confess that deep down I have a bone to pick with people who get plastic surgery for cosmetic reasons. Now before you get up in arms I want you to understand that I am in no means talking about a person who was disfigured, burned, injured, had acid thrown in their face or whatever else may warrant the use of plastic surgery. I'm speaking about the people who go out to get a nose job or boob job because they are unhappy with how they look naturally. The problem is that these people have a heightened sense of arrogance as a result of their fake plastic "upgrades" and often look down on others who they deem unworthy of their time and/or attention. I feel like the moment they paid some quack to cut them open and change the way they physically look is the moment they tapped out and announced to the world that they weren't born good enough. I just want to put it out there to everyone that just because someone pays to change their face, add bigger boobs/butt or make their lips look stupid doesn't make them better than you. Just know that they felt they needed thousands of dollars worth of unnessassary sergury to feel good about themselves rather than just owning their body and living life with a little humility and dignity. They may act like they're something special, but they aren't.
Rating: +5
My favourite porn is videos of women masturbating to orgasm. Some are selfies, some have been made by boyfriends and husbands and some are professionally made. One of my faves is of a beautiful woman being stimulated by a guy's fingers and she looks on at herself as he brings her to a quivering orgasm.
Rating: +18