Hiding Text Messages

So over the course of the last 11 months I have witnessed strange behaviour from my GF. She received a slew of text messages while sitting on the couch. She looked at all of them except from some guy. I kinda wondered about this but said nothing. She then left to bring the garbage out with her phone and when she got back and put the phone down I noticed that the text had been deleted. Couple months later we are at a party and its like 3 in the morning and keeps getting a bunch of text messages. She leaves the room and I grab the phone and she gets a message from some guy asking if I am around? I notice that all messages prior to this are deleted. I say nothing but feel like that is so strange and makes me feel like thats such a strange thing to ask her. Then a little while later in the month she gets more messages from someone who she claims is just a friend. She wont let me look at them when I am around. I ask her to see the message and she refuses saying I dont trust her and gets super angry and defensive. I said if she had nothing to hide why wont she let me see. I have never minded my girl from having guy friends and shes hot so its expected that she will get hit on.
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DTMFA

Feb 28, 2013 at 12:53pm

Lying, cheating. Make it quick and move on

27 8Rating: +19

Been there!

Feb 28, 2013 at 12:57pm

Do yourself a favor and get rid of this girl. Two things can be happening, either shes having an emotional flirt with some guys because she wants to string them along to get certain things ie money, drinks, club nights with no cover something like that, or because shes wants to keep them on the back burner in case it doesnt work out. Or shes cheating on you maybe not physically but emotionally. She deletes them because she knows what was said would look and make you feel aweful. If you care about someone you want to ease their mind. It doesnt create trust thats for sure. Good Luck.

28 8Rating: +20

SJ

Feb 28, 2013 at 1:02pm

I understand your suspicions, it is unusual behaviour. My point of view, if you are feeling a bit insecure about this and think something may be up, talk to your girlfriend. Say what you've noticed. If she loves you, she will want to squash your insecurities asap, right? From experience, getting angry and defensive only means she could be hiding something. If she's being honest and has nothing to hide, she will show you. And if otherwise, she probably has something to hide.

23 8Rating: +15

Oh yeah . . .

Feb 28, 2013 at 1:12pm

regarding DTMFA. I suggest breaking up with her over texting as it is obvious she likes this form of communication. Do it today. Do it now.

31 6Rating: +25

RUK

Feb 28, 2013 at 3:00pm

Gee what great suggestions.

How about you make sure your next girlfriend is a Real Doll. They don't create any complications.

8 9Rating: -1

WOW

Feb 28, 2013 at 5:00pm

Chances are she's doing something questionable for sure. Truthfully if some guy messages me at 3 in the morning its for one thing and one thing only. If I am in a relationship with someone I care about I would not delete or hide anything. Its always better to be honest and let the other person decide how to deal with the issue then to hide things and be dishonest and a liar. That does not build trust, and we all have our insecurities. I would talk with her about these feelings and just confront her. Hope that helps!

18 7Rating: +11

PF

Feb 28, 2013 at 5:03pm

Dude, it's my fault. I'm sending the messages and I asked her to delete hem right away, and to keep everything secret. You're not supposed to know. Sorry.

Communication is key.

Feb 28, 2013 at 5:07pm

I don't know why she's being secretive about text messages. What does she say when you talk about it? It's not a surprise party for you--is it?

It sounds as though basic values of open communication, truth, honesty and trust have gone out the window with new technology with some people.

You have no control or power over another person. They are going to do what they're going to do. If your gf doesn't want to show you her communications there's nothing you can do but be aware of what that means to you. If it's deal breaker DTMFA.

If you're not sure ask yourself: Do you know what qualities you value most or least in relationship with your Gf? Do you have open, honest communication and trust?

For me, I need open, honest communication and trust in relationship. I like to feel close and be close. Sharing things like texts is very intimate and close. Often those closest to us get to see things about us that we don't share with everyone else. It means more to me when someone is voluntarily open and honest. I have more trust in them and we're free to focus on other things that make us stronger because of it. I hope you find out what you want to do about this. You can't demand someone to share intimacy with you. If they're not willing, why are they with you? Best of Luck.

20 6Rating: +14

nut gobbler

Feb 28, 2013 at 7:29pm

she is out in secret getting balls across her chin every night she can . Congrats on finding yourself a hot skank.

13 8Rating: +5

naked truth

Feb 28, 2013 at 8:52pm

Ok, she's unfaithful to you.

16 8Rating: +8
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