i get so jealous

Boy meets girl. or girl meets boy.where ever.music fest or online. I've been through it all. First month or two are amazing and then I suddenly hit this wall. Your ex who? Your ex what? The ex that you keep bringing up. May be I have a wild imagination that doesn't help me with the vivid sexual images or just the painful feeling that you will leave me for any other woman. This horrible ugly insecurity suffocates me. Tortures me til I literally can't take it anymore. I leave you. I decide its better this way. You've done nothing wrong. You deserve better. And I'm better off alone. And then I get lonely...and the cycle continues...only this time its different cause I realize if I really wanted to be with you I wouldn't find a reason to be jealous. I would trust you and take the risk that is love.

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yup

Feb 21, 2013 at 5:20pm

this is my life

I'm just a jealous guy

Feb 21, 2013 at 8:35pm

yes, I'm terribly jealous

RUK

Feb 21, 2013 at 9:13pm

On one hand, I think it is very rude to bring up an ex, or any other topic that is an obvious source of discomfort. You know, it is one thing to fart occasionally but if a person is going to have a continuous fartfest they can do it with someone else, and I feel that way about bringing up painful topics.

On the other hand, you too have a role to play. Jealousy. What is it good for? How does it help your relationship?

And consider this. If they liked the ex so much, they would be with the ex. Instead, they are with you. YOU WON!!!

Now act like a winner! Enjoy your life!

Welcome wagon

Feb 21, 2013 at 9:32pm

Welcome to the sexual revolution. We got freedom and gave up security. Who would have guessed?

Trust yourself

Feb 22, 2013 at 12:00am

Trust yourself to know when you're ready to take the risk that is love. You are better off on your own rather than in a relationship that isn't for you and doesn't work.

It's natural for most people dating to have an ex. At some point the topic will come up. Watch how it surfaces. Who brings up the ex first? How often? Bringing up an ex too often or too early, is an indication you're not or he's not over the ex and is stuck living in the past. Ex's shouldn't be the main event at all. Try not to compare yourself to others' ex's. You're with him and he's with you. That's what matters.

You should know that you can take charge of setting your boundaries around what you want to discuss and what you don't. Remember this relationship includes you. You deserve someone who respects you and your boundaries...Trust yourself.

@Welcome wagon

Feb 22, 2013 at 12:34am

Who would have guessed you're out to lunch, trapped and insecure?

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