Did I write this while I was sleeping? It sounds all too familiar.
If she is spending hours looking at cat videos as well, then we are living parallel work lives.

You could possibly play 'quiet' with her. Do your job, speak when spoken to, but don't go out of your way for her any longer. The silence over time will separate you from each other. You don't owe her anything.

She might be your manager or supervisor , but not your superior!

How are you trapped there? Please explain, or I will assume that you are not in fact trapped but are choosing to stay. Love, the Robot Monster.

Be friendly with all the people you work with, but remember none of those
people are your "friends." Everybody has an agenda. It's not the same as
yours.

It would happen if she were a woman or not. Friend or not. It's called people being immature people. You will see it everywhere. She will go though friends like you and co workers who eventually get bored with her game. Karma will arrive eventually. Or not. Either way you must put on your Teflon body suit and get the fuck on with YOUR happy little life. Manipulation by others is a constant. You can make it a battle or ignore the fuck out of it. Your choice.

oboy is this a familiar story. karma will pay her back. i had a supervisor jr. to myself and my other coworkers. we had a small team of 5 people. our 'supervisor' power tripped, took credit for everything, dumped all her work on us while she surfed the internet for vacation packages. the rule of thumb is if you are having probs with your supervisor or manager, chances are so is everyone else. we gathered together, called a meeting without her and had it out in a rational manner with her boss. she was soon shipped out into the field to do training and hardly spent any time at home let alone our office. since her employment status changed, the company later ended up closing our office and she went without a termination package. she missed out on big bucks and was back to the office for a visit to witness our receiving these packages. boy was she pissed. served her right, she took her attitude into the field and didn't have a very good reputation with the clients. don't know if she ever learned a lesson from it, don't really care but you reap what you sow. it's too bad because we had a good working atmosphere until she was promoted and ruined the environment. btw, these days, supervisors and managers don't seem to be getting the training they need, are often thrown in the deep end without knowing how to do their jobs but it doesn't mean they have to be dorks to the rest of the staff.

That's the definition of a bitch. An immature, likely drunk beee-ach. And I'm a woman. Follow the above advice. And I owe you a sundae for being brave. Love love!

"Trapped" in the sense that my education level is low, comparable jobs with the same pay/benefits are few in my community, and I am confined to working daycare friendly hours. I get that technically, I'm not trapped...it's just more challenging to move on.

take a course. don't overdo it if you have kids. just start by taking 1 course, online ed is widely available and not that expensive usually with plenty of time to complete. you will feel more empowered and will have a better handle on your future. book an appointment with an education counselor, a phone call to a college will be a good start. there are also lots of 1 or 2 day seminars, classes, too. if not, see if there is any on the job training available, there may be an education budget. don't do it through your 'friend' she will likely stifle your endeavours & consider you a threat. go for it. it will be your secret joy, believe me. good luck!