Are you happy? If so, then ignorance really is bliss. But if you're not, you might as well ask. No point in living a lie. My dad did the same thing to my mom. Although he is a great dad and I love him, it slowly chipped away at her already fragile self-esteem. Don't let your husband do that to you. It's all you have, in the end. Good luck.

You should lighten up and allow him to enjoy himself. Are you keeping yourself attractive and willing for him? Don't rock the boat and everything should be fine.

Do you think you and your children would be happier without someone like him living in the same home as you? No one should have to put up with the 'cold treatment'. And by the way, why ask him??? He's not likely to be honest about it if he were. Maybe talk to a lawyer? Maybe try a trial separation? Maybe boot him out of the house? So sorry you are going through this...

What if he's living a double life and has another wife and more kids. Happened to a friend of mine. I hope that's not the case and your husband is just an innocent hardworking man.

You hold more power in this relationship than you think. You cannot change the way things are between you and your husband, but you can certainly change the nature of your relationship. If he wants to maintain a nuclear family facade but be a so-called free man on his time off it doesn't seem really fare for you to not be able to do the same, does it?

if I had children with the man and we were married. I'm still unsure about monogamy, if it's against human nature, or if you're just not with the right person. A notorious cheater I know, never tells the woman he lives with and his relationships end very badly. People get hurt. He's even found out that he's a daddy from long ago. Real fun, huh? Only you can make the choice, to stay or to leave. I wish you luck.

If you think it's happening, it probably is and you are just ignoring the clues so you don't have to deal with it.

He's likely hiding it from you so he doesn't lose out financially.

It's a horrible situation and you might want to ask yourself if this is a relationship you want to be committed to for an indefinite amount of time. Don't worry about your kids, they will do well to be influenced by a mum who can stand on her own.

Being alone is not scary and pretty awesome compared to being in a loveless relationship. It will be a learning curve for you if you've never done it, but may be the best experience you've ever had!

Hope things work out.

But if what you fear is true then all you can do is walk towards that fear and face it. In the end you'll find relief, strength and finally a much happier life. Good luck.

I would say try talking to him first but I don't think that anyone would admit to be unfaithful. Could be that he is working hard, is stressed out and has fallen into a rut? The question here is, are you happy? Would you be happier without him? Would your kids? Would you be able to survive on your own? Start doing things that make you happy. If you can't ask him if there is someone else, then privately do what you can to find out. It is your right to know, the answer will help make the proper decision. Good Luck.

I think the monogamy issue is neither here more there. Plenty of adults have found ways to accommodate different needs, e.g. Popes, presidents,etc.

You already know, anyway.

The real problem is that he gives you no sex or love and is cold. That is not life partner in any way shape or form, and it has to be horrible for you and for your kids. I think you should be working on your exit strategy...he's not a good influence at all. Good luck, better days are ahead.