Can't Understand Why people Break Up

posted February 28th, 2015 at 9:41 PM

Consider that we have two people in a relationship, A and B. A will be infinitely miserable staying with B, and B will be infinitely miserable with A leaves. How is it that people in our society, who claim to not be selfish, to be community minded, etc. etc. can justify making people miserable? Why shouldn't they choose to be miserable? I've been miserable for years, since someone who told me she would be with me forever in a marriage like relationship decided to turf me like a used diaper. Why does our society act so callously and call it maturity?

5 Comments

Why

Mar 1, 2015 at 4:40am

Turn your questions around:

Why don't you choose to be unselfish, accept to be miserable, and let the other person go? If you can't do that, you're being unfair and hypocrite to ask that others choose to be miserable instead of you.

Why do you want to force them to stay against their will? Why act so callously and with such immaturity? You are miserable because you choose to stay miserable. Nobody can make you happy but yourself.

This must be the 10th time you're posting the same question on Confessions. If you want to force a partner to do everything as you wish, it's no wonder that they run away from you. Thankfully, in our society, people are free to do whatever they want (for most part).

Because

Mar 1, 2015 at 9:44am

You are not entitled to a relationship. A relationship is something you have to earn every day. Also, why would you want to be in a relationship with someone who is miserable being with you? Another person is not just a prop for your life.

Hmm

Mar 1, 2015 at 9:59am

Was that your first relationship?

Sure it sucks getting dumped, but very Very VERY rarely do first relationships last.
Hell MOST relationships end ...and that's because people jump into them too quickly before really, truly getting to know each other.
When people are just starting to get to know someone (with the idea of possibly dating them) they put on their best behavior.

I think the best way to know if someone is going to be right for you is by being "just" friends for a long while first because then you see who they really are.

Consent 101

Mar 1, 2015 at 10:50pm

B needs permission from A to be in a relationship with A.

A does not need permission from B to leave B.

If you have a problem with that, go get married in a culture that forces people - using death threats and the like - to stay together.

Can't wait till you cross paths with somebody you're not crazy about who happens to be stalker-crazy about you.

It's an easy answer...

Mar 3, 2015 at 2:12pm

People change, relationships change. Just because it was amazing in the beginning, doesn't mean it will be amazing for the rest of your relationship. Others have already posted most of the common things, but you need to work at it. A successful relationship takes %100 of your effort for %50 of the relationship and the same goes for your partner. If only one person is doing that (which happens in most cases) then that is why people breakup. Another good article to read is very straight forward as to why couples do.

http://thedailyeight.com/lifestyle/8-signs-to-call-it-quits-on-a-relatio...

All 8 reasons are very legitimate and real reasons. Learn from your past relationships and try to make the next one better, that's all you can do :)