I want to date but...
posted May 19th, 2015 at 9:42 PM
I find it hard to do so when I'm so unhappy with how the rest of my life is going. I'm clearly in the wrong career and need to switch jobs or go back to school because it's wearing me out and making me feel dead inside, but due to money and other adult responsibilities I have to stay in this situation for awhile. Plus, I barely have any friends here since I'm not from Vancouver originally and it's quite hard to meet people. Part of me feels like dating might improve my situation and at least offer some fleeting happiness by having someone to go out and do stuff with or offer a little romance. But then I think: what kind of impression would I even be giving off to people right now? I'd either have to fake happiness and pretend I love my life to seem fun and pleasant, or I'd have to tell them how lame my life actually is and be a total downer. I don't think either of those options is very attractive to anyone. I guess this probably means I'm not ready - it feels like a catch-22 though.
5 Comments
Post a CommentIn the same boat
May 20, 2015 at 12:27am
I definitely feel your pain. I am in a very similar situation right now, and have decided that it's probably not best to go out actively looking for people. I am focusing on spending my time with quality people, exercising, making myself delicious meals and doing anything else that I find enjoyable. I would suggest focusing your time on yourself, whether that means indulging in hobbies you love or spending your spare time actively looking for that new job. You're probably more qualified for different careers than you think; good luck!
silverware
May 20, 2015 at 3:25am
I say just start dating if that's what makes you happy. Plant the seed of happiness/ satisfaction/enjoyment/ whatever it is you want in your life; wherever you can and let it grow. Hippy Dippy I know but that's how it works. Find your balance of pleasure and pain in life. Too much in either direction for too long isn't healthy.
life is ever changing; there is a flow to it and so must we as humans flow to be in balance while we live. How you flow is up to you. Preachy sh** short, you're not alone in feeling blah about life. Reach out, open up and see that others feel the same and get some pleasure in your life. Most people just needed somebody else to do something about it first. Be open to where things will take you. Set a goal, follow it, let it change, let it change you.
Both of the
May 20, 2015 at 11:49pm
above responses apply.. Enjoy yourself.. So someone else will too..Just make sure know what you want and need be straight about it when you do date someone.. But always make time for yourself
SMD
May 21, 2015 at 12:50am
I am in the exact same boat. I try dating occasionally but then I end up sabotaging things before they can grow or get serious - it's a pattern I've noticed though, and stopped. Reading these responses was very refreshing and encouraging. Thank you strangers
Date
May 23, 2015 at 1:22am
when you have a chance at love, take it. Jobs come and go, but the right person may stay in your life for a long time. Maybe even forever.
Also, the right person wouldn't see you as a downer if you were going through a tough time. They might bring you up when you need it most.
Life is strange and it's hard to have all your ducks in a row at the same time. Might as well have one or two of them.
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