To all you quasi-folk musicians with well kept beards, who falsetto one moment and do little group quire shouty things the next, you earnest songwriters you, with your cheery infectious songs, and all you silly girls who sing with preschool accents, and all your dumb band names that describe nature and wild animals that imply 'hey everyone!!! I'm so authentic!' I won't even dare say that word that starts with an H. You know who you are! You're on borrowed time, there will be a day when your top-knots fall and your overalls come undone!