I can't imagine being a psychiatric nurse, quite a difficult and challenging job, and coming home to someone who expected me to handle their situation.

Not necessarily expected to handle his situation, but perhaps maybe she empathizes with it? I think everyone has some degree of mental quirk.

My advice - apologize to her if you need to do it, but move on and sort out your shit before you even attempt to create a future with her. I was in a similar situation a couple of years ago in the sense that I was willing to wait for him to sort out his shit, but he has a lot of shit to sort out, you know? Maybe he meant it when he said he'd come and find me when he was ready or maybe he just said that to make the break easier. Regardless, it's not my job to sort his life out for him, though I'd have helped him gladly if he was the type of guy to ask. He wasn't - he wanted to be whole for me, not still in pieces and I respect that. So your question really is: do you want to go to this love of your life in pieces or do you want her to take you back as a whole man? What does she deserve? Good luck. It's not an easy situation.

This is an interesting problem. First and foremost I would say definitely apologize to her. Sincere apologies can make all the difference.

Second, the only fair way to have her in your life right now is to be 100% honest and to allow her to help you through your inner battles. This means no holding back, and accepting the fact that when someone cares for you, they crave to help. It makes someone feel good to assist another through challenges, that love and trust creates bond formation. It's not a burden. It's your own personal view of yourself that is causing that mentality. When you care deeply for someone, it really hurts to be shut out.

However, I noticed that you said right now you're at a point where you need to sort things out by yourself. That statement alone tells me you are not ready for her. I think the question to ask yourself is do you want to do this alone? Or are you willing to let someone else help you? Be clear about what you want before going forward. She deserves that.

As far as your professional life, that's another thing you need to measure the importance of. Would you sacrifice it for a chance at love with this woman if need be? Do you think she would be willing to come to a compromise to wait and support you through your career explorations? Ultimately she should be your priority if you're truly ready for this. Saying you love her won't be enough, she'll have to be shown. Actions speak louder.

No one can predict if she'll forgive you or reject you. It depends where she is in her life and how badly you've hurt her. It's all in the delivery of the apology, sounds like it's gonna be from the heart, so I'd say you have a shot at forgiveness at the very least. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Je me souviens.

That part where you looked down at her and saw your future wife...ah man, that made me feel sad.

You have so much to lose if you don't do something. Fight for her! Lay it on the line, give her time & space to take it all in and see what happens down the road. You'll forever regret not trying something, trust me.