You are a shitty friend and then some. You expected her to just intuit that you'd had a miscarriage when you didn't ever tell her you had, but there she is pouring her heart out to a "trusted friend" during what was probably the most traumatizing and painful time of her life, and you ghost her? You're an asshole.
Being a friend to someone is (surprise) not always about you. Sometimes you have to be there for someone ELSE, and let them return the support by sharing your side, not just expecting everyone else to constantly be thinking about and asking about you. Everyone is concerned with their own traumas, if you want commiseration and support for yours, you have to actually share, not expect them to drag it out of you like some prize. You are not special. You do not deserve more pity and consideration than anyone else. She needed you and you thought only of yourself.
As a friend, you fail.

...like your baby did to you?

This is the way friendship should work.