...it turns out to be whichever of the two is easiest to get away from. You can be compassionate about someone's well being and want a nontoxic atmosphere for yourself at the same time. You can't support anyone else if you aren't in a stable place.

Interesting the advice to leave him. mainly from all the lonely women who can't stand the idea of anyone else being happy.

I don't know your definition of "jerk" but my friend stuck with her husband for almost ten years hoping to help his supposed mental illness which lead to a lot of physical abuse near the end. Don't be afraid to put yourself first in situations that are toxic.

Does he use his illness as an excuse or a free pass to explain his behaviour? If so, he is not in the space to heal and he will take you down with him. If he is making attempts to actively help himself then you need to ask yourself what is the best course of action to help him and to support yourself. Good luck.

Don't hook on an anchor in deep water.

Sucks for him and you will feel guilty. Guilt is good, it causes (non psychopathic) people to ask whether they are doing the right thing. But it is a question, not an answer. You know the situation and its probable outcome. If you can't deal with it, then you can't.

Is a choice whether it be mental, verbal or physical. Ask yourself if he treats other people the way he treats you (friends, family, coworkers) and if not, it's likely that he takes his stress and anger out on you. Plus, if it is his mental illness talking, he needs to sort that out on his own. It's not up to you to wait around until he gets his shit together.

Make a choice to be happy. Respect yourself and demand to be respected. And don't feel bad thinking about leaving if you aren't happy and your partner isn't making you happy. You have one life, better to live it feeling the way you want.

It's okay to ask for what you want. If you like the relationship, but some aspect of it is bothering you, then it is okay to negotiate. People are always saying that we shouldn't ask others to change, but in reality, it is sometimes necessary. If he is doing something you don't like, I think it is reasonable to ask him to discontinue that. If he doesn't want to, then you can decide whether it is worth it to break up, or to accept his behavior and continue the relationship.
Mental illness is not an excuse for intransigence.

All the lonely women? There's only been one reply. She's also not happy. I think you just like to try to bait people. Weakkkk.

I was in the exact same position, and when I came into work one day, totally falling apart, my boss told me this: Get out. You can either have two unhappy people or one unhappy person.

It's taken me a year and half to get over the abuse of my mentally ill partner, and some days it still haunts me. I think sometimes abusive people use their illness as an excuse for being terrible. I stayed much longer than I should have because I felt like I could help him. But a relationship is not a rescue raft, they need to meet you halfway.

Whatever you do, remember to take best fucking care of yourself possible. Abuse can mess with your mind, and make you feel like you are not worthy. But you are.

People with mental illness often aren't themselves, they can say horrible things, and it's difficult to live with them at times. And even if they're trying to seek help and get better, the reality is that mental health resources are thin on the ground, unless you've got bucks to invest in private treatment or your insurance covers it. If you do decide to stick by your partner, just be sure to cultivate your own support network and don't try to get through this on your own. Best of luck to you.