Manipulative Sociopath Straining Relationship

I've been seeing this trans guy for about 2 months, and I care for him so much already. We immediately felt this intense connection and have insanely close parallels all throughout our lives, so it feels like I've known him for much longer. About 6 months ago he left an abusive relationship with this girl, and she's still finding ways to hurt him despite her living in the states now. His parents are super religious and don't accept him as he is at all, so he keeps a lot from them. They don't even know that he's ever been in a relationship with a girl, as they've kicked him out of the house for less significant things. This ex of his has been contacting him relentlessly - bombarding him with walls of hate-filled insults, threats, and blame. She's using ever bit of manipulation she can to try to hurt him. One minute she's threatening his life, then saying she'll kill herself because of him, and then threatening to tell his family everything because they would disown him (and they would, they did it to his older sister already because she married someone they don't approve of). He's tried blocking her number but she finds ways to get around that, and now her friends are also sending these messages. He's barely sleeping and is being incredibly distant. We're in uni together and he's really struggling with finals right now because of all this. I care for him so much, and I want to help, but I don't know what to do. She has him around her finger, because if he stops responding, she'll tell his family everything and he'll be disowned. Yes, that will have to happen in the future, as he has chosen to be happy with himself rather than staying on good terms with his family, but in first year uni he really needs their support. I barely see him now that all this has started, and I miss him a lot, but I don't want to impose. I want to shank this girl who is hurting him so much. I really don't know what to do.

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Ah...

Dec 5, 2016 at 1:47pm

What a tangled web we weave
When we practice to deceive.

0 0Rating: 0

awful

Dec 5, 2016 at 4:01pm

somebody should call her parents. u can threaten her with libel and slander and tell his parents that person is a deranged ex friend who is suffering erotomania. Sorry for the usage of stereotypes etc, but what a mess. That person needs some help. I don't know if you should reach out to the ex or pull away and drop all communications. maybe you could even go to the police.

0 0Rating: 0

Hmm...

Dec 5, 2016 at 10:16pm

Too bad everyone pretends it is impossible to close their social media accounts and change their numbers. There needs to be a complete cut off from that person, you can't let threats from a person in another country stop you from living your life. Seems that protecting him from his parents is based on lying to them so maybe that's where the problem can be addressed. That or your lover is lying about them being in another country and this whole story is to keep you from finding out they are still hanging around together. You did say that you hardly see your bf as a result of this lately. Sounds like a tough one but it sounds like there is a lot of lying or bending of the truth going on here.

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It isn't for you to do anything

Dec 6, 2016 at 11:36pm

These are his problems. Not yours. Not your job to solve them. You also say he is being distant. It sounds like he needs some space. It would be great if he knew you were there for him but without the stress of all the stress it seems to be causing you.

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