Phase change

It's good to know that, given the right person, I can fall for them after just a few hours in their company. And the interest is mutual. I'm no longer wary of leaving my relationship because I won't stay single for long. I'm very useful in many ways, but being used has gotten old. Being treated as property is worse. Being neglected sucks. And narcissism and egotism in a partner...no fun. Entitled much? It's been three years too many, and my options are getting better. She won't know how absolutely over this relationship is until I walk out that door. And I won't miss her. I'm literally packing my stuff, in full view and with enthusiastic approval. After that, I'll just wait for the bus going the right way. Nice to have something to look forward to.

5 Comments

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Good for you

Mar 19, 2017 at 4:17pm

Given the right person, I fall in love very quickly too and usually manage to get them to fall for me as well. Unfortunately, I don't meet someone interesting and interested every day. It's a rather rare occurence that becomes more rare as the years go by, and the better catches are taken first. Also, I tend to care too much for people, and find it hard to let go even when the relationship isn't working. If it's easy for you to move on and find someone new, then nothing should stop you.

5 2Rating: +3

Might as well

Mar 19, 2017 at 7:31pm

You've already left her

8 1Rating: +7

ralph

Mar 20, 2017 at 6:17am

Nice. Very Nice. Thanks for the lift. It's not about hardening your heart. It's taking a realistic look at people and relationships. You don't sound hard hearted to me, just pragmatic. With Spring just days away and warm sunny weather surley to grace us chilly Vancouverites love will be out big time! Embrace it, open up to people and possibilities, be kind and loving and generous and if it doesn't work out exit without malice.
Thanks for the post. I'll be more open this Spring because of you.

4 3Rating: +1

With hope...

Mar 20, 2017 at 8:38am

I hope you know the other person you met fell for you too. And is hurting because you are still with her.

3 2Rating: +1

OP

Mar 20, 2017 at 4:52pm

@Good
It's much, much easier to meet people elsewhere (even for an introvert like me) and happens to me almost every time I travel.
Here, most people avoid eye contact and wear "too good for it" like a skin. They present like I just said something awful, even before I speak. Not worth it and I don't try anymore.
All my connections here are either misfits, or have lived elsewhere or were exposed to other cultural norms, or moved here from somewhere else.
It's not easy to leave, but it will happen and I no longer dread it because I wouldn't stay here.

@ralph
Glad I could help.

@With
We share amazing chemistry and a lovely intellectual connection. We're both introverts, geeks and dog people. Both of us lived in the US and have family south of the border that is a concern (obvious reasons).
But we have different life goals: she wants to move to Whistler and I'm headed off-continent. Also, she's on a year-long contract in an out-of-the-way place where I'm not likely to return anytime soon.
But she really enjoyed my company because she sees "more assholes than a proctologist" in her profession (her words, and yeah, I love her clear-eyed cynicism, too). We had a lovely couple of evenings hanging out and chatting for a bit after she was done work.
I think she now has more hope, too. I wish her more contentment. She's working too much and not eating regularly. She deserves better.

4 4Rating: 0

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