you haven't known the person long enough to know for sure that it can last.
Depends
Apr 25, 2017 at 1:41pm
There is no correct answer.
On the one hand love is blind, and if you're sacrificing career/friends and family then yes it is. Relationships can end, and in cases like these you stand to loose the most for something possibly superficial.
On the other if you've been together for a long time and (s)he really has the potential to be your future husband/wife then perhaps it isn't so crazy.
At the end of the day I suspect you made you decision (to go), feel that deep down its the wrong decision (hence the confession) but want reassurance non the less to confirm that choice. Just a hunch.
Hi OP
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:10pm
I did - quit my job, sold all my belongings, gave up my fantastic apartment, said goodbye to family and friends and moved across the globe to be with the woman who i adored. The relationship didn't last, but i ended up staying in the country for 8 years, and my life took off professionally, personally, financially... because i kept saying yes to all of the opportunities that followed.
That original 'mistake' (other peoples label) of moving ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me. I am twice the person now than i was when i left Vancouver. What i'm saying is, if you decide to go, try to see it as something larger than just a romantic adventure. If it doesn't work out, don't come back with your tail between your legs - stay and grow and prosper. 'Mistakes' are gems that can be turned into incredible opportunities.
if crazy means you're a menace to yourself and/or others
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:13pm
...then yes, sometimes.
But it can also be totally reasonable. I'm assuming it is because of mutual goals, desire to be together, build together. And not because one of you is a stalker!
expat
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:37pm
that depends... i've done it but i was dating the person. now if you aren't actually in a relationship with this love it's probably not the best idea to chase them across the globe. especially if you don't have job prospects in the new place.
YOLO!!
Apr 25, 2017 at 3:48pm
You only live once. I say do it! What country?
Not at all
Apr 25, 2017 at 4:48pm
People do it all the time. What else is there in life that matters as much?
My lover did
Apr 26, 2017 at 2:45pm
Infact, I've had two people move to be with me. In both cases it was a mistake in the sense that we wanted different things and didn't have the wisdom to end the relationship before they turned their life upside down. On the other hand, both of these people have gone on to do relatively well with their life.
So yes, it can be crazy. Love is a crazy little thing.
But the growth that comes with this sort of adventure can be truly beneficial even if the love doesn't work out.
Caution
Apr 26, 2017 at 9:24pm
I'd recommend caution. Maybe a short term stay at first on a visitor's visa. Think of it as a vacation. Make sure you have a round trip ticket. Make sure people you trust know where you are and when they can expect you to check in with them.... just in case that person is an axe murderer.
No ....
Apr 27, 2017 at 6:58pm
I would have in my 20's but it would have been complex in my case. Would I today - yes, still complex but I have different outlooks. However I'd need to ask myself do I want to swap a very close friend for a lover and what if it didn't work - I'd loose a lover and more importantly a great friend.
10 Comments
Post a Commentonly if
Apr 25, 2017 at 1:29pm
you haven't known the person long enough to know for sure that it can last.
Depends
Apr 25, 2017 at 1:41pm
There is no correct answer.
On the one hand love is blind, and if you're sacrificing career/friends and family then yes it is. Relationships can end, and in cases like these you stand to loose the most for something possibly superficial.
On the other if you've been together for a long time and (s)he really has the potential to be your future husband/wife then perhaps it isn't so crazy.
At the end of the day I suspect you made you decision (to go), feel that deep down its the wrong decision (hence the confession) but want reassurance non the less to confirm that choice. Just a hunch.
Hi OP
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:10pm
I did - quit my job, sold all my belongings, gave up my fantastic apartment, said goodbye to family and friends and moved across the globe to be with the woman who i adored. The relationship didn't last, but i ended up staying in the country for 8 years, and my life took off professionally, personally, financially... because i kept saying yes to all of the opportunities that followed.
That original 'mistake' (other peoples label) of moving ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me. I am twice the person now than i was when i left Vancouver. What i'm saying is, if you decide to go, try to see it as something larger than just a romantic adventure. If it doesn't work out, don't come back with your tail between your legs - stay and grow and prosper. 'Mistakes' are gems that can be turned into incredible opportunities.
if crazy means you're a menace to yourself and/or others
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:13pm
...then yes, sometimes.
But it can also be totally reasonable. I'm assuming it is because of mutual goals, desire to be together, build together. And not because one of you is a stalker!
expat
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:37pm
that depends... i've done it but i was dating the person. now if you aren't actually in a relationship with this love it's probably not the best idea to chase them across the globe. especially if you don't have job prospects in the new place.
YOLO!!
Apr 25, 2017 at 3:48pm
You only live once. I say do it! What country?
Not at all
Apr 25, 2017 at 4:48pm
People do it all the time. What else is there in life that matters as much?
My lover did
Apr 26, 2017 at 2:45pm
Infact, I've had two people move to be with me. In both cases it was a mistake in the sense that we wanted different things and didn't have the wisdom to end the relationship before they turned their life upside down. On the other hand, both of these people have gone on to do relatively well with their life.
So yes, it can be crazy. Love is a crazy little thing.
But the growth that comes with this sort of adventure can be truly beneficial even if the love doesn't work out.
Caution
Apr 26, 2017 at 9:24pm
I'd recommend caution. Maybe a short term stay at first on a visitor's visa. Think of it as a vacation. Make sure you have a round trip ticket. Make sure people you trust know where you are and when they can expect you to check in with them.... just in case that person is an axe murderer.
No ....
Apr 27, 2017 at 6:58pm
I would have in my 20's but it would have been complex in my case. Would I today - yes, still complex but I have different outlooks. However I'd need to ask myself do I want to swap a very close friend for a lover and what if it didn't work - I'd loose a lover and more importantly a great friend.
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