were you reading dan savage?
he obviously must not be very experienced, unless he was making assumptions based around a fact you were a mom.. (sorry ladies).
that's a discussion best saved for down the road, besides - doing "that" take s a fair bit of preparation with toys and lube etc. - not something to just happen to dive in on.

Yup same issue. Dudes are more into power positions and de humanizing the act. Most of my friends say they only do it to please their man. But actually HATE it. Yes there are some who actually like it. But for MOST of us it's just plain shitty and humiliating.

Regardless of your sexual preferences, can we please never say lady garden again? Assuming you aren't 8 or 80.

"Sorry, I'm just going to go take a stroll through my lady garden . . ."

Ok, a couple of different things going on here. These dates are certainly not being respectful by trying to do something like that so soon. Maybe it's not your cup of tea, but if you want to get gynecological, there is actually a 3rd extension of the G-spot/clitoris nerves that is below the vagina and stimulated by anal. It gives you a different kind of orgasm, apparently. (He probably wasn't trying to please you in that way, by the sounds of it though). Maybe its something you should explore with a plug etc. alone and see if you like it first?
He's probably been watching too much anal porn, but as a guy who watches it (when I'm single), there's not much to see as far as "lady garden" otherwise (think about it for a second). It's not really the act that I find arousing, myself.
On the subject, I did have one lover that taught me how to do it, but it was generally far too stimulating (tight) for me.

"...like all the anal porn that saturates everything now"

Right. I was just on the bus the other day, and there's this advertisement involving anal porn! I don't know where you are, lady, maybe you're the one with the ass fixation.

Some men like the ass. If you're attracting them, it could be you. I mean, I don't ask for anal on the first date, but, then, I don't ask women out, because some of them think that is harassment.

Honestly anal is not a turn on for me.. just strikes me as a dirty sh#t pipe... I have tried it before.. went fine but still not my thing..

so i'm a girl, and in the right situation, I love anal. Like-really, really, love it.

But there's only been a few situations where that's been the case.I've had a few unpleasant experiences as well ...even with incredibly wonderful lovers in other ways. It seems (for me at least) that it's just something that only works with certain dudes (and certain penises). So my advice to you, OP, would be to not write it off just because you've had some bad experiences. It's possible you might like it with the right dude.

And my advice for dudes is---- don't ever assume it's ok to just 'go at her'. it's DEFINITELY not something that should just happen.... stop ruining it for everyone by doing what you're doing. I think porn probably is part of the issue-it makes it look so easy. It's not. It takes time and a lot of lube and patience and being careful.

and I"ve been in a lot of situations with dudes where they seem to think it's cool to just go at er...blows my mind.

Nope not reading Dan Savage.
What is with the mom thing? Please explain. Not sure if I should be offended. Nope not a mom.
-- I like lady garden. It implies there is bush. Better than clear cut. Lol
---oh I've tried it. Not my cup of coffee.

Yeah, his automatic assumption that he has the right to just go there without making sure you're okay with it first is really asinine (no pun intended even though it's a good one). I think a lot of men are simply completely ignorant about REAL women because they are so brainwashed by porn that they don't realize that porn isn't reality. Men need to comprehend that porn is fantasy largely made by males and for males. The women in the movies either love it right from the start or by the end of it. Not to say that anal can't be great, but it's not something that any guy should simply go for unless you have made it clear that you're okay with it too. Any sex should be completely consensual and for those hetero men that don't get what the big deal is about anal for women, perhaps you should let her go to town on you with a big dildo and no lube. Unless you are okay with that, then don't make the assumption that she is either!

LOVE IT!
Fuck the above poster (Or don't, actually).
Everyone start using this!!!