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posted Saturday, August 4, 2012 at 4:43pm
I met a girl online (I know, I know - strike 1), she lives in the states and we have talked for about 1.5 years. We're very into each other and after months of planning/re-planning we finally agreed to meet for a week-long vacation at a city halfway between she and I (I know, I know - strike 2). Monday would have been three weeks before our vacation and she lets me know that she got a new job and couldn't turn it down. I've been looking forward to seeing her for over 6 months, now it's reduced to nothing. I realize it was probably stupid to be involved in this, but sometimes you just follow your heart. She's the best, we had a great connection, or as much as you can online. But over a year worth of constant communication isn't nothing, either. Now I don't know if I'll ever see her.
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Aug 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm
Sorry hun, but online connections mean NOTHING.
I kn ow I know, you are going to say...
BUT..............................
1 we relate to eachother
2 its exciting
3 she understands,compliments,makes me feel good
4 we share photos and our days so i feel like i am a part of her life
5 I have never felt this way about anyone else
and a thousand other reasons you may have...
but hun, understand this....
its JUST Online.
its not real, you have never looked in her eyes, felt the touch of her hand, seen the look on her face when she laughs, tasted the sweet kiss of her lips, or more important... FELT real chemistry in person.
I am sorry to tell you, but after 1.5 YEARS of chatting....and now more excuses while the 2 of you cant meet, says this IS and will remain an online connection.
Save your heart and money. Try to 'connect" with a woman that is actually interested in "meeting" you in person. You have wasted enough time ..dont be played any longer.
PS. yes, I have tried the online thing. actually and have been very successful. ;)
to be successful , You MEET. no excuses.
Good luck to you :)
I kn ow I know, you are going to say...
BUT..............................
1 we relate to eachother
2 its exciting
3 she understands,compliments,makes me feel good
4 we share photos and our days so i feel like i am a part of her life
5 I have never felt this way about anyone else
and a thousand other reasons you may have...
but hun, understand this....
its JUST Online.
its not real, you have never looked in her eyes, felt the touch of her hand, seen the look on her face when she laughs, tasted the sweet kiss of her lips, or more important... FELT real chemistry in person.
I am sorry to tell you, but after 1.5 YEARS of chatting....and now more excuses while the 2 of you cant meet, says this IS and will remain an online connection.
Save your heart and money. Try to 'connect" with a woman that is actually interested in "meeting" you in person. You have wasted enough time ..dont be played any longer.
PS. yes, I have tried the online thing. actually and have been very successful. ;)
to be successful , You MEET. no excuses.
Good luck to you :)
Aug 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm
I met someone online who chatted with me almost every night and originally said he was living in another city and then (said) he'd moved here. He had excuse after excuse to not meet me. Then I found out he'd lied about his name, and probably everything else he'd told me. I figure he was married, or wasn't the guy in the pictures he'd sent me. Anyway, I felt like a fool, but it was a learning experience.
It's disappointing to put so much of your time and heart into something to have it not materialize. It's crushing. Hopefully this hasn't affected your ability to put your trust in someone else.
And maybe I shouldn't say this, but I'll put it out there anyway - I wonder if, as in my case, she was hiding something from you and that's why she didn't meet you. Just a thought, because it happened to me.
It's disappointing to put so much of your time and heart into something to have it not materialize. It's crushing. Hopefully this hasn't affected your ability to put your trust in someone else.
And maybe I shouldn't say this, but I'll put it out there anyway - I wonder if, as in my case, she was hiding something from you and that's why she didn't meet you. Just a thought, because it happened to me.
Aug 5, 2012 at 9:13 am
Pictures, phone conversations, and webcams can be faked. You were probably with a dude. At least you didn't have sex with him. Well at least in the traditional sense.
Aug 5, 2012 at 4:57 pm
With all the negatives about meeting someone off of the web, I am going to interject with something positive.
I met someone a year and 5 months after we started talking...and I like him far more that I have met him (obviously). The reason why I didn't meet him earlier is that I had my guard up with men for various reasons. Anyways with this man, we first conversed through e-mail, then after probably 5 months of back and forth, I gave him my phone number, where we started speaking on the phone, and also chatted via video. Obviously not everyone would wait around that long, but we both had busy lives, which is why it took that long.
You do not say if you have heard her voice, or have Skyped with her...because in my case I still met the person after almost 1.5 years, and it turned out great...but I heard this person's voice, and saw him before I actually met him. If you did not hear her voice, or even Skyped with her then I suppose she wasn't serious about it. But even if you guys didn't do these 2 things, and if her job offer was real, and she was serious about meeting you, she could have met you after. Does a new job entail working for 24/7? No, she could have met you on the weekend or after work in her city, or she could have gone for a weekend trip to your proposed destination.
I am saying that not all online relationships are bad, and in some cases like mine, it does take quite a long time before meeting, but the meeting does happen, and it's fantastic. But there are cues that both parties need to partake in before the meeting takes place, if this doesn't happen then the other party is not serious and is taking you for a virtual ride.
I met someone a year and 5 months after we started talking...and I like him far more that I have met him (obviously). The reason why I didn't meet him earlier is that I had my guard up with men for various reasons. Anyways with this man, we first conversed through e-mail, then after probably 5 months of back and forth, I gave him my phone number, where we started speaking on the phone, and also chatted via video. Obviously not everyone would wait around that long, but we both had busy lives, which is why it took that long.
You do not say if you have heard her voice, or have Skyped with her...because in my case I still met the person after almost 1.5 years, and it turned out great...but I heard this person's voice, and saw him before I actually met him. If you did not hear her voice, or even Skyped with her then I suppose she wasn't serious about it. But even if you guys didn't do these 2 things, and if her job offer was real, and she was serious about meeting you, she could have met you after. Does a new job entail working for 24/7? No, she could have met you on the weekend or after work in her city, or she could have gone for a weekend trip to your proposed destination.
I am saying that not all online relationships are bad, and in some cases like mine, it does take quite a long time before meeting, but the meeting does happen, and it's fantastic. But there are cues that both parties need to partake in before the meeting takes place, if this doesn't happen then the other party is not serious and is taking you for a virtual ride.
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