I recently separated with my spouse of 12 years because I couldn't stand being in a sexless relationship anymore; it was breaking my heart. It was a hard decision. And now I am alone and this also sucks. Quite frankly, I just want to get laid like there is no tomorrow. I don't need to find the love of my life, or start a new relationship, etc. I just want to have sex with a man with a healthy sexual appetite who turns me on and makes me feel appreciated as a woman. I'm starting to think this is going to be harder than I thought.

Every night before my colleague and I leave the office we are required to set the alarm. He's a generally good natured guy but in that crotchety old man kind of way. Every time we set the alarm it requires us to be still for a few seconds before it is ready to be armed. I always stand behind my colleague as he sets the alarm. Every so often when the green light signifies its ok to put the code in I'll wave my arms as silently as possible when he presses the buttons. Ultimately, the alarm doesn't arm itself and he's forced to try again. I do this several time while he gets angrier and angrier. He gets so mad at the alarm keypad. It's amusing to watch. When I've had enough I remain silent and we're finally good to go. He may never know.