posted Tuesday, November 26, 2013 at 8:50pm
I am a 39 yr. old Male living in the B.C. interior in a small city that has a reputation for being cosmopolitan and non conformist in many regards. I love living in this area for all the natural beauty and outdoor recreation as well as the counter culture that it is known for.
However, I find it incredibly repressive when it comes to small town gossip around sex and dating. I am involved in a 7 year relationship with a woman whom I love and feel deep affection for, however our sex life has been mediocre at best due to my partner's Bi Polar condition and medication which has pretty much killed her interest in most forms of intimacy.
She is not interested in any kind of couples counselling that might address our drastically different libidos, and to her credit she has given me permission to seek out casual no strings attached sex as long as it is safe/protected.
The other string attached by her is that this sex must be limited to scenarios where it is not FWB , as she rightly is concerned that may lead to romance.
Therefore I am stuck with the awkward scenario of finding women in a small town who are looking for discreet play with no strings attached. So far this has been fruitless and the few women I have had a flirting type connection with are kind of stunned when I suggest a casual date, as they all know that I am in a long term relationship.
My partner has kept our arrangement a secret from even her closest friends and I have had one of them approach me asking cryptic questions about "how I'm doing" and where my partner is.
I am so sick of people in town gossiping and judging me with out knowing the real facts, and the irony is really strong because I have yet to hook up with any one else.
Even worse is people that I love and care for gossiping with out even having the guts to approach me and discuss this and find out the real truth behind the matter....