posted Saturday, September 21, 2013 at 5:35pm
At first I didn’t see you, I heard you. The low growl of your voice echoing through Stanley Park, bouncing off the waves soaking my skin, making me wet. “Did someone just instruct autobots to roll out…?” I asked myself as a naked man passed me by in the surf. “No surely they said autoBOATS….after all there are lots of boats around, not autobots”. But then I heard your voice again. This time announcing your name as Optimus Prime. “Optimus Prime?” I said to myself. Viewing my own reflection in the water I could tell I looked as shocked as I felt. I started to shake. And then, there you were. Your helmet shimmering in the sun, rays bouncing off forming a protective shield around you, ready for the deceptions as per usual. I imagined those rays bouncing off me. Wait a minute...“does Optimus Prime wear speedos?”, I asked the person who was swimming past me. I got no answer, just a gasp for air and the splash of water hitting me in the face. I squinted so I could see you better. Yes, you were Optimus Prime, and yes you were wearing a speedo. But why where you posing on all fours in the surf? I quickly ran through every episode of transformers I’ve ever watched and could not recall such a time Optimus was ever rolling around in the surf! I wanted to ask you why, I wanted to understand you more, but knew doing so was a risk. Autobots were surely somewhere close. So much I wanted to know, but next thing you know you were packing up your towel and getting back on your bike (sidenote: not sure why you didn't just transform?). I stood in the surf following the gleam of your helmet as far as I could. I started to run after you, but you biked faster and suddenly I fell. There I sat, water engulfing me, yet it was curiosity that threatened to drown me. Who are you? Where are you from? Can you drink whiskey through that helmet? And can we go for a pizza?
WhenWednesday, September 11, 2013