It's all Aladeen all the time in The Dictator

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      Starring Sacha Baron Cohen, Ben Kingsley, and Anna Faris. Rated 14A. Opens Wednesday, May 16

      Attention, it’s fun-question time: why did Admiral General Aladeen give Katy Perry a more expensive gift than he gave Megan Fox? Answer: because Katy let him “Aladeen” in her face. Get it? Wake up! In the oppressed (fictional) African nation of Wadiya, its loving oppressor had tons of words changed to “Aladeen”, thus making things kookily confusing, as in “Are you HIV-Aladeen? Or HIV-Aladeen?” And now readers may ask: is Sacha Baron Cohen’s The Dictator Aladeen or, er, Aladeen? It’s Aladeen!

      Thank God, Allah, Aladeen, and L. Ron Hubbard (just so Scientologists won’t kidnap us and make us watch Battleship Earth) for Baron Cohen and director Larry Charles. They know we want films that mock women, the Jewish peoples, war crimes, 9-11, health-food types, and human-rights activists (especially those last two). Did you Aladeen or Aladeen him in the satires Borat: Cultural Learnings of America Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan and Brüno? You’ll Aladeen him now—or you’ll get this: (friendly throat-slitting gesture).

      Aladeen comes to New York, gets kidnapped by a mystery operative (John C. Reilly), gets stripped of his beard, and is suddenly anonymous and alone, like the rest of us. He meets health foodie and human-rights activist Zoe (Anna Faris), realizes his 2nd-in-command (Ben Kingsley) is into skulduggery, and enlists his former chief nuclear physicist (Jason Mantzoukas) for help.

      Aladeen looks like Moammar Gadhafi crossed with Saddam Hussein. He calls Zoe a lesbian hobbit. He plays “Wii Terrorist”, which involves the Munich Olympics. He shares a tender moment with Zoe inside a pregnant woman’s vagina (you gotta be there—okay, not literally). After the birth, he says: “It’s a girl! Where’s the trashcan?” Yep, we totally Aladeen this movie. We laughed because we like laughing at superoffensive, un-P.C. silliness. And we Aladeen anyone who mocks Crocs: “They’re the universal symbol of a man who’s given up hope.”


      Watch the trailer for The Dictator.

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