Promod Puri: I want to be a Canadian senator
Lately, I have an itch to be appointed a Canadian senator.
I must admit that, perhaps like most Canadian citizens, I have very limited insight about what the job description is for a senator.
However, I do know that one of the pressing tasks a senator has is to travel, and travel a lot. It could be travel within this vast country or anywhere else in the world—as long as a senator is roaming, he or she is performing the job.
And here I perfectly qualify to become a senator, as I love traveling. Send me anywhere in the world. I’m adaptable, though my preference would be sunny and warmer places, especially in the winter months.
I have already earned thousands of mileage from being a frequent flyer, so I’m well qualified for the job when it comes to travel.
Besides being an experienced, ever-moving itinerant, my other qualifications as a rightful and exemplary Canadian citizen are as follows:
1. I have lived in Winnipeg and walked around Main and Portage for several winter months over several years, so I truly know what a Canadian winter is like.
2. Although I have never played and seldom seen a live hockey game, I have followed this Canadian sport and cultural icon on TV—including the world-famous after-defeat street show in Vancouver.
3. I have travelled Canada relatively more than an average Canadian, from British Columbia to Quebec, and this summer I plan to cover the Atlantic provinces as well (if I am appointed senator).
4. I am a nonpartisan, middle-of-the-road, main-street Canadian who has held no membership ever to any political party, though I must admit that I voted couple of times for the Green party and never voted for the Conservatives.
5. Yes, I have an RRSP too.
If I am appointed senator, I promise that I will do my job relating to travel to the best of my physical ability, and report back to taxpayers every month all my expenses without waiting for any audit.
I hope to be seen—rather unseen—as a touring senator all over the globe, especially in Hawaii, Tahiti, Bora Bora, or even Timbuktu.
Here, I must concede that I won’t be a trendsetter, but I’m confident that within one year of my appointment I can beat any record relating to travel expenses.