An open letter to Trish Kelly, former Vision Vancouver candidate

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      Yo Trish Kelly,

      I’m really sad for you, Imma let you finish resigning, but you had one of the best videos that’s emerged during a municipal election cycle that I’ve ever seen.

      Your monologue about masturbation (which was unceremoniously taken down not 10 minutes after I started writing this note of appreciation) was awesome.

      Yes, that's right: me, a woman living Vancouver, both watches and appreciates pro-masturbation videos.

      You know what else I do? I vote.

      And with your resignation, Vision Vancouver has lost the only guaranteed vote I was going to cast for its slate this year, leaving me in the awkward position of having to pick between this guy and that guy, dusty old men who seem divided by not much more than a bike lane.

      Let me say that it is refreshing to see a woman talk so openly and joyously about one of the greatest pleasures in the world: the physical act of self-love.

      Trish, you had my vote, one hundred percent. You’re open, you’re honest, you’re funny, and you’re unafraid. Those are the sorts of qualities I look for in my civic election candidates. Fearlessness. The ability to laugh at oneself. And the willingness to talk about a woman’s body without a lick of shame.

      Your resignation is a massive disappointment. I appreciate that you don’t want to make the entire campaign from here on in about your work as a sex-positive activist. But, why not? Why not talk about women’s sexuality and sexual health in addition to all that tired old blathering about view corridors and bike lanes?

      If Vancouver is a truly progressive city, where’s the harm in being progressive about sex, too?

      Here’s a word of wisdom to the brain trusts who are promoting stuffy older white dudes as candidates: you need women like Trish. You need women who are unafraid of knowing what they want and going after it. You need someone who won’t shy away from taboo topics and tackle difficult subjects.

      Vision Vancouver lost a great candidate in Trish Kelly. Who am I supposed to vote for now?

      Yours most sincerely,

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      Jul 17, 2014 at 6:02pm

      "Imma"? What the fuck does imma mean? Why is a white girl from Vancouver trying to sound like a black guy from Detroit?


      Jul 17, 2014 at 7:07pm

      Ah, Trish kelly, We Hardly Knew Ye. Or, possibly we knew ye a little too well...

      If she was 'unafraid' wouldn't she have stayed, fought the good political fight and and stood up for her post? What this really shows is a) she's just a toady to the will of the Vision machine and must adhere and/or b) not made of the stern stuff that one needs to be to inhabit the political arena these days.

      Or, could it be, that, the nexus where a a really-not-that-funny-or-entertaining-sex- positive videos meets a political career just doesn't resonate with people who are checking out the candidate's abilities.

      A video on the joys of masturbation may play well as performance art, but not so well as an intro to a person who says they are going to to a (forgve me) a serious-minded comepetent politician (a contradiction in terms?!). It's a little bit of cognitive dissonance that has been created between her private ramblings/fumblings and her public life.

      Seriously, let's halk this one up to the nexus of youthful stupidity and the vagaries of the Internet age. If you can't stand up for it, please don't post it.


      Jul 17, 2014 at 7:19pm

      I enjoy diddling myself as much as the next human but of all the ridiculous issues to toss a vote for this has to be the most ridiculous. Imagine if she had stayed onto be elected: you would be voting for another developer rubber stamp all because she did a good video on masturbation. The idiots who vote based on their predilection for bikes helped give us these minions for development, giving them another vote for a pro-masturbation candidate is absurd. Please don't vote if this is your typical thought process: where does she/he stand on masturbation? I support only pro-masturbation candidates.


      Jul 17, 2014 at 9:15pm

      *cough* run for COPE *cough*

      Local Masturbator

      Jul 17, 2014 at 9:16pm

      Support COPE!


      Jul 17, 2014 at 9:38pm

      Gee Miranda, may I speak about female candidates as "dusty old women"? May I also disparage candidates on their sexual orientation or race?

      May I also assume that I should not vote for any simply because they are well,women? I mean how could they possibly be worthy of my vote?

      You don't have to answer. I know fully well that to people like you, the only time a person may be openly sexist is when they speak about men. PATHETIC

      Nathan Crompton

      Jul 17, 2014 at 10:20pm

      Miranda Nelson sounds pretty cool


      Jul 17, 2014 at 10:52pm

      Top vote getter at arranged Vision Nomination meeting gone? Amazing! Indicates how weak a selection process VV has!

      Must be worrisome for Gregor?


      Jul 17, 2014 at 11:51pm


      Also, Jack, it's an obvious Kanye West parordy. get with the times.

      Worth considering...

      Jul 18, 2014 at 12:23am

      ... that she and everyone knew that video was out there and would come out... so to bail so quickly really is pretty cowardly. All issues aside, someone who can so easily be swayed and manipulated by public opinion over something she knew and must've told everyone was "no big deal if it gets talked about" -- isn't really cut out for public office. You need 3-foot iron armour coated with teflon to survive the personal attacks. This was nothing, yet she bailed in less than 48 hours. Not even worth an asterisked foot-note in the history of civic politics of this city.