News for Youse: The word of the day is "strike"

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      In case you missed it, Saturday (March 17) marked the six-month anniversary of Occupy Wall Street. And how did all of those anticapitalist rabblerousing hippies celebrate? By retaking Zuccotti Park in New York City, of course. At least 73 people were arrested in the peaceful protest.

      Of course, March 17 was also St. Patrick's Day, that revered religious holiday wherein we drink green beer, pretend we are Irish, and get into lots and lots of trouble. Perhaps the NYPD figured they could brutalize some hippies and get away with it, claiming religious fervour or some such?

      OWS protesters and all other good little agitators are now calling for a general strike on May 1. After all, strikes are all the rage these days. The BCTF had one before being legislated back to work (they're protesting the hell out of that, by the way). In Nova Scotia on Monday, hospital workers in the capital district voted 91 percent in favour of striking.Library workers are striking in Toronto. Israel's set on striking the shit out of Iran's nuclear program… oh, wait. Wrong kind of strike.

      Well, you get the idea. This kid knows what we're talking about.

      A recent study has found that male fruit flies will go on drinking binges if they are rejected by too many females. And by the way, humans have the same chemical impulses in their brains, which make explain why we hit the bottle so hard when we get turned down on St. Patrick's Day. Our biggest question, however, is how much do these people get paid to study the libidinous habits of insects? This sort of groundbreaking research wherein we find out that alcohol makes your brain temporarily feel good must pull in some big cash.

      Here's your philosophical musing for the day: can a dead man help conceive children? Well, more specifically, what rights, if any, would said children have to, say, their dead father's money? That's one of the questions the U.S. Supreme Court was busy mulling on Monday. It's actually an interesting legal and/or moral question. At least we think it's a moral question; we here at News for Youse failed every single one of our college-level philosophy classes, so we might not be the best authority on the subject.

      And our fondest birthday wishes to Mr. Rogers, the greatest human that ever lived. Rogers, who passed away in 2003, would have been 84 years old today.

      For more Mr. Rogers hero worship, follow Miranda Nelson on Twitter. She seriously knows way too much about the man, but not in, like, a creepy way.