2005 in review - Celebrities

Paris in the bling time

Paris Hilton announced she would begin selling neck chains, collars, pendants, and other jewellery for dogs in the style worn by her dog Tinkerbell. "In addition to my own sense of style, I think a lot of people admire Tinkerbell's look as well."

Not fretting about it

"It's great to meet her and it doesn't matter at all that she did not know who we are or what we do."-Eric Clapton, on attending a royal reception where the Queen asked him and fellow rock guitarists Jimmy Page, Brian May, and Jeff Beck what they did

Whateverrr”¦

"I read the Kabbalah books and I meditate on them. They are all in Hebrew. I don't understand everything. But it's kind of okay that you don't."-Britney Spears, in Elle magazine

Good press helps

"I find ironing helps get me in the mood before I perform. I always have an ironing board in my room before going on."-Vocalist Robert Plant

Victims of a different sort of Sting

"We were doing drugs in the dressing room. Suddenly the tour manager stuck his head around the door and said, 'The police are here!' We all panicked and threw our drugs in the toilet. Then Sting, Andy Summers, and Stewart Copeland walked in."-Rolling Stones guitarist Ron Wood, reminiscing in Guitar World about a Stones show in the 1980s

Minding the bollocks

"Every time I see Bono in those big fly glasses and tight leather pants, I just can't hack it. I can't see that as solving the world's problems. He's crushing his testicles in tight trousers for world peace."-Former Sex Pistol John Lydon

Cheap ostentation

Donald Trump was criticized when he revealed many of the services and products for his wedding were donated in exchange for promotional consideration, including a half-price deal on a 13-carat wedding ring from a jeweller who was featured on The Apprentice. "Only a fool would say, 'No thank-you, I want to pay a million dollars more for a diamond,'?" Trump commented.

Split screen

"It was like opening the door to our house and having someone come in and take your big-screen TV off the wall during the big game, and there's nothing you can do about it."-Country singer Kenny Chesney, quoted in Life magazine on the emotional impact of his divorce from actor Renée Zellweger, following a marriage of just several months' duration

Oh my my

Stan Lee, the comic-book creator of Spider-Man, announced he would turn ex-Beatle drummer Ringo Starr into what a news release called an "evil-battling, Earth-saving (though reluctant) superhero with a great sense of rhythm" in a series of comics.

Banana quackery

"A bottle of water, two Advils, and a banana before bed. Responsible drinking includes planning ahead with the banana."-Actor Shawn Ashmore, with his cure for a hangover

Suspicious mind

B.C.-born record producer David Foster, along with his wife, Linda Thompson, and her two adult sons from her marriage to Bruce Jenner, starred in a short-lived Fox network reality show called The Princes of Malibu. However, according to Macleans magazine, Thompson was concerned about how Foster would come across on TV due to his jealousy, which she said includes her pets, children, and even a long-dead famous ex-boyfriend of hers. "David truly hates for anybody to mention Elvis. The man has been gone for almost 30 years. I don't think that he's going to rise like Lazarus and come back and reclaim me."

Embarrassment of pitches

Complaining that commercials are an unnatural use of his work, Tom Waits protested a European car ad that mimics his singing style. "It's like having a cow's udder sewn to the side of my face. Painful and humiliating."

Or our money back?

"I know when you hear it you will be seduced by its beauty."-Actor Russell Crowe, on a new album he recorded

The times they are a-changin' his mind

"I wouldn't even think about playing music if I was born in these times. I'd probably turn to something like mathematics."-Bob Dylan

Through a glass, darkly

"You would have to believe they were magic sunglasses that only block out your friends who were shooting people."-Assistant U.S. Attorney Cathy Seibel, following rapper Lil' Kim's conviction on perjury charges related to a gunfight in which Kim insisted that she didn't see anything