My Confession
posted January 2nd, 2018 at 2:41 PM
I'm in my early 20s and having an issue... How does one get over the anxiety/insecurity of having a boyfriend and dealing with instagram girls and snap chat? I don't want to be one of those girls that doesn't trust their boyfriends and wants to check their cellphone
18 Comments
Post a CommentLet go
Jan 2, 2018 at 4:10pm
of your insecurities.
Social media
Jan 2, 2018 at 4:19pm
Don't look at social media. Problem solved.
Instaddict
Jan 2, 2018 at 4:23pm
Choice A: Be suspicious and look through his phone and live in a consistent state of paranoia
Choice B: Explain to him what your insecurities are and talk through it as a couple
Also, by IG girls do you mean just girls in general or specific ones that he follows and are friends with him?
Overall, there's nothing you can do to isolate your boyfriend's activity on social media. Guys like to look at good-looking women, whether they have a gf or not. You can't stop that. The problem comes in if he chooses to act on those impulses. However if he truly cares for you he can be open and honest with you as to his intentions when he follows girls on IG.
The Editor
Jan 2, 2018 at 4:39pm
You sound like you have trust and control issues. Is this what you're confessing?
Over
Jan 2, 2018 at 5:55pm
Just get over it.
~
Jan 2, 2018 at 6:18pm
In my opinion if someone is in a relationship they shouldn't be cruising women on instagram or anywhere else. It's the online version of the wandering eye.
Ideally, expressing your feelings to him is the best way. But what I've found is that nowadays guys think this is acceptable behavior, as is watching porn. Most of them think they're entitled to do whatever they want in a relationship.
If he ignores your wishes, do what I do - play hardball. Gather as many admirers as you can and post sexy photos on instagram. Don't degrade yourself of course, just make yourself look really good. Follow as many hot guys as you can. Like their photos.
See how boyfriend feels about all of it then.
Hmmmmmm
Jan 2, 2018 at 7:12pm
I notice that many comments are suggesting that the Op has an insecurity problem. To those people I ask this: if you are a guy and your girlfriend was following/ checking out/ flirting with/talking to other men, would you feel ok with it? If not, then don't assume that a woman should be. It's entirely normal for anyone in a relationship to be concerned about their partner interacting with other people that way. It doesn't make them unusually insecure or jealous, it just makes them human.
If he truly lurbs you
Jan 2, 2018 at 7:32pm
He'll stab his eyeballs out of his face in order to reassure you that you are the only woman he ever wanted to see... when he still could.
Jokes aside, most human beings look and lust at other human beings. I guess you could try to seek out an asexual if your anxiety is really bugging you; but the reality is that most people with a libido will want to fuck other people at some point. If you get all worked up about this reality, then the person you're with is more likely to seek solace in the arse of another.
GenX
Jan 2, 2018 at 8:41pm
My generation never had that level of instant distraction and fodder for shallow interactions. I feel sorry that this is common modern culture. It's so shallow, weak, destructive, and immature. If your boyfriend can't see through the BS of social media and is helping create conditions that make you distrust him, then he needs to smarten up as you are already way more mature than him.
Anonymous
Jan 2, 2018 at 10:22pm
By Instagram girls I mean the ones that are “normal” girls meaning they aren’t famous but they post pictures of their bodies all the time. Thanks for the advice everyone
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