We dated for over a year

Whenever I tried to end things, you would charm me back to you. The last time we were together you and I made plans and talked about our want to spend time together. Then you became distant. Then you stopped responding altogether. Then you finally called me and I was so happy to hear from you. But you only called to tell me you couldn’t see me any longer. I appreciate that you finally spoke to me and shared your feelings and said goodbye instead of simply disappearing. But I confess I am still hurt and have not been able to turn my emotions off of you. I miss you but I am also confused by your behaviour. Why did you keep holding on and charming me back just to dump me once I finally let you in. I waiver between heartbreak and anger. I wish that I could see you one more time in person to have my say...but now you will not answer my messages. You are a master at ignoring the things you don’t want to face.

6 Comments

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Married?

Feb 18, 2018 at 8:05pm

Quite possible married.

Gem1

Feb 18, 2018 at 10:09pm

This sounds really painful but your voicing your feelings makes you sound emotionally mature beyond the likes of this person. The heart wants what it wants but you deserve more.

Details details

Feb 18, 2018 at 10:21pm

See, I don't remember any of that. Mind you, it was a hundred years ago and you might just be right. The basics hold true however- I still love you more than anything and would love to see you again...

16 years ago

Feb 19, 2018 at 7:54am

I was the person that you describe in your post. It took me a long time to realize how hurtful lack of communication is in the dwindling stages of a relationship. That said, sometimes feelings draw to a close, and it's very hard to describe in real time what is happening to yourself, let alone another.

I hope this person comes around and offers you an opportunity for closure. It might take them some time and space, but you deserve the resolution.

Anonymous

Feb 19, 2018 at 10:55am

"Ghosting" in Vancouver. Dating is a flight risk my dear. Just concentrate on your studies/career and/or your hobbies, have fun. The nicest guys are treated like trash and the nicest girls are not treated right by the losers. C'est la vie in this city.

The right person will treat you like a treasure, so hold out till you are sure about giving your heart to him/her. Just have fun and above all be yourself. All the best :)

Well

Feb 19, 2018 at 5:29pm

Any explanation you do get wouldn’t make you feel better, and voicing your side would only (possibly) make it better if the other person was capable of understanding, which it sounds like they aren’t.

The hardest lesson I have had to learn in my life is that closure and healing come from within. It’s not ignoring your feelings but moving your mind, inch by slow inch, to a space that is healthy for it. Sometimes we just don’t ever get to know what is really going on.

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