Please change

posted March 22nd, 2018 at 7:22 AM

Someone I love very much is drinking his life away. It's so sad and it seems nothing I do or say helps. He's such an amazing person sober but when he drinks becomes this selfish, inappropriate, belligerent asshole. He either doesn't realize or doesn't care that he's putting those who love him through absolute hell. I love him so, so much and know that underneath this toxic bullshit there is someone who is hurting deep down. I just wish I could stop the pain for him. Now all I can do is stand by and be there for support when he needs me but it's very hard to support someone that's abusive toward me verbally and emotionally which makes me resent him. I've been losing sleep and if nothing changes I will unfortunately have to cut ties and let him go.

5 Comments

Anonymous

Mar 22, 2018 at 10:37am

I have lots of experience with alkies.

Alcoholics are abusive, manipulating users from hell. They try to talk themselves up as if they're something special, while acting like big babies.

The only thing you can do with an alkie is let them go to their own private version of hell, since they're going there anyway and will happily take anyone dumb enough to care about them down with them.

I could go on, but I think I've made my point. Let the fool go, before he hurts you any more.

Rehab

Mar 22, 2018 at 12:04pm

Not sure how old they are. Programs exist in BC for free for younger people with substance problems. If your family can afford to send them for help, that is all you can do. You do not deserve to be abused. Not judging but I have lost everything in my life going through hell, babies died, husband left, lost job and pets. But I would not turn to alcohol or drugs to cope. Have to keep fighting.

I get that

Mar 22, 2018 at 12:15pm

I too love someone who was drinking to stupidity. I finally wrote him a letter with all of the times he hurt me due to alcohol. The list was long. And sobering. He was super embarassed and thanked me for the wake up call. Things have been really good since. Sometimes they just need someone to love them enough to call them out. Sometimes they need to be left alone to sort it out.