Requesting a woman's opinion

I would like to get the female readers to give me their thoughts on this topic.I'm a 46 year old man and when I talk to women I quite often call them "my dear" or "sweetie". When I say it I'm never hitting on them or saying anything inappropriate. I use the terms the way I might call a guy " buddy" or "fella", just a friendly way of showing that I enjoy talking to you and being in your presence. I would like to know from the female readers if they think it's appropriate for me to continue this or should I stop. I usually don't get much feedback from the women I'm talking to either positive or negative concerning this so I would like some honest feedback.

30 Comments

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A Chick

Apr 24, 2018 at 8:11pm

Anyone who gets offended is just way too uptight. I don’t mind if guys call me those names. It can feel a little odd sometimes but I just brush it off as the guy being nice, not creepy.

My advice

Apr 24, 2018 at 8:20pm

is that you shouldn't use such terms. It depends on the woman but some might find it patronizing or too intimate. Save it for the women you know well.

Please don’t

Apr 24, 2018 at 8:54pm

I hate it when a guy refers to me as dear or sweetie or any other nickname unless he knows me well and we have established that it’s okay. I feel that it’s too familiar and in a way it’s demeaning. It’s as if he’s putting me into a category that he has not earned.

Hey, bub...

Apr 24, 2018 at 8:55pm

Don't play it innocent. You obviously already know your affectionate terms towards women can be construed as being hit on. Perhaps you're not exactly coming right out with your one liner, but you most certainly are testing the waters to see if they'd be warm to it.

Anonymous

Apr 24, 2018 at 9:15pm

The only time this is appropriate is if they are your spouse.

Dog1barking

Apr 24, 2018 at 11:25pm

Just sounds a little pompous. Think you try "sister girlfriend" instead. You're welcome.

Mary Agnes

Apr 24, 2018 at 11:46pm

using "my dear" and "sweetie" makes you sound like a grandma...use their names if you know their names...

36 9Rating: +27

My two cents

Apr 25, 2018 at 1:06am

It's patronizing and condescending to use these terms when addressing a grown woman. You don't need to use any terms at all. Just speak normally.

24 9Rating: +15

You'll have much better results...

Apr 25, 2018 at 3:31am

If you call people by their names, and do it constantly. Ever read Dale Carnegie? People warm up to you when you mention their names.

19 8Rating: +11

FWIW

Apr 25, 2018 at 4:13am

I prefer dude.

16 8Rating: +8

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