No need to be a jerk

You know I have crush on you, but telling me that you're hooking up and how it was a stress release hurts me. Just be straight with me and tell me the truth to stop liking you. No need to be a jerk towards me.

8 Comments

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Reading between the lines

Jun 20, 2018 at 12:18am

Them telling you they hooked up and how good it was IS them telling you they are not interested. They don't need to say it any other way when they told you the answer. You're unreasonable to expect it spelled out for you. That isn't how socializing works.

17 6Rating: +11

ummm

Jun 20, 2018 at 7:29am

don't you think they ARE telling you that...maybe in a rather jerkish way?

15 3Rating: +12

Do they really know though

Jun 20, 2018 at 1:30pm

Sometimes we think our feelings are obvious but they only feel that way to us. Unless you've told them, maybe they just think you're friends and don't realize your feelings run deeper.

5 3Rating: +2

Dear OP

Jun 20, 2018 at 2:44pm

The first responder, and the person you are speaking of, are probably guys. Most of them have an inability to just straight up tell a woman if they aren't interested (or no longer interested) and so instead use indirect methods to communicate.

6 9Rating: -3

Anonymous

Jun 20, 2018 at 4:34pm

Stop whining.

5 5Rating: 0

@DearOP

Jun 20, 2018 at 11:27pm

I'm the one who wrote "Reading between the lines" and I'm a straight cis woman. A few questions:

*Does me being a woman change your theory?
*Can people of all genders act in a variety of ways?
*Do human beings have a variety of reasons for being nonconfrontational?

6 2Rating: +4

Crushes are just meant to crush you.

Jun 21, 2018 at 6:35am

Many years ago, I had a really big crush on a girl I worked with, and I suspected that she felt the same, but I didn't really know it until the moment she became aware that I had "hooked up". Not that I had any prior plans to hook up with anyone, but I was out getting drunk with my buddies, and they all started making fun of me for still being a virgin at the age of 21, and how I couldn't be considered a real man until I lost it. Well, I guess me being a virgin turned on the girl that was sitting with us. I don't have to tell you what happened next.

Anyways I saw my crush's composure take a nose dive the instant she found out I had a hookup, and then I knew at that moment how she had felt for me. The next day I unhooked myself for her, because I saw how much it hurt her, and I cared more about her, than this person that I hooked up with, and didn't even know, and whose name I can't recall at the moment.

It didn't make any difference for us ever hooking up though, since work ethics, and social conduct made it impossible for any feelings to really be expressed. There just a chance of anything happening back then. But I kept myself single nonetheless, because the last thing I wanted to see was her feeling hurt. Later she ended up hooking up, and I got hurt, so I ended up leaving since there was nothing I could do about it anyway. Seem less painful for me that way. Then I found out that me leaving hurt her, so I waited alone, and I came back when all those things that had kept us from hooking up back then weren't that big of a deal anymore. Unfortunately by that time, she was less interested in wanting to hook up with me, and more interested in me wanting to hook up with her just so she could hurt me for leaving after her hook up... and she did.... left a good scar on me too. Still acts up a bit, among all the other scars I have accumulated through the years.

8 1Rating: +7

@crushes

Jun 21, 2018 at 10:32am

WT* did I just read? It was entertaining though lol.

3 3Rating: 0

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