Today I'm one year sober. A year ago I was found passed out in a ditch on the side of the highway naked spooning a pylon with a dick drawn on my face. When I got to the drunk tank, I was spitting on cops and being absolutely belligerent. I ended up in a potato sack (straight jacket) with a spit mask on. I was singing Christmas carols and got in a verbal argument with another dude in the cell over because I wouldn't shut up. When I finally sobered up, an officer and I spoke about my crazy night. He said he was amazed at what a nice gentleman I was as a sober human being. He ended up connecting me with a drug and alcohol rehabilitation program and I never looked back. I wanted to kill myself the day before. I took a bunch of Xanax and drank myself into oblivion to drown the pain of my dad passing away a week earlier in a car crash. He was all I had left as my mother died 5 months before from a drug overdose. The last thing I ever said to him was that I hated him and wished he would fucking die. I'll still never forgive myself. He was decapitated when a pole slid off a truck and smashed through his windshield. My friends tried to help me but I was beyond repair.. there was nothing they could do. I didn't want to be in reality. I couldn't stand to be alive. I know this story sounds absurd and made up but believe me it's not. Today I woke up feeling so good. I usually feel sad in the morning because the first thing I think of is my parent's deaths but today I felt at peace. They would be proud and I think would have forgiven me for the way I was. Life is beyond beautiful and I'm so happy to be alive. Here's to another year of sobriety. Life is good.