You should actually call the guy. Actually talking to someone tends to make them appear in your life. Relying on anonymous posts like these ....well...he might not know it's meant for him. There's a lot of that on here these days.

but the guy I'm wishing you were is more a stoner than a drunk and has a g/f.

Bleak

I had a cup of tea and tucked myself into bed. Staring up at the ceiling through the dark with my hands folded on top of my chest I quietly said goodbye to nine years of you and drifted gently into dreams of a finer tomorrow.

Hell no. I'm going to get drunk and beat off to porn that reminds me of her just like always.