I give up

How do I break back into the world of dating after spending the last 15 years waiting for what I thought was the love of my life basically in solitude? I haven't even had sex in all this time. How the hell do I explain that?

11 Comments

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Questions

Oct 20, 2018 at 9:15pm

Are you saying that you haven’t dated for 15 years, or were you with someone (the love of your life?) for that time? Was that person a friend that you secretly hoped would be more than that, or what? I’m confused. If you were just single, not dating, hoping that the love of your life would fall through the ceiling or something, then I’d say you have some work to do before you get out there.

7 5Rating: +2

You're doing fine

Oct 20, 2018 at 9:28pm

Cicadas are on a what? 17 year cycle something...you're just getting started!

6 4Rating: +2

I'm in the same situation

Oct 21, 2018 at 2:20am

I waited for years, heartache after heartache. Nothing worked. And I haven't been intimate with anyone for years. But you know what? There are people like you and me out there. Everyone has their own story and life circumstances. We all deserve to be happy, and find someone to love.

10 4Rating: +6

therobotmonster

Oct 21, 2018 at 7:37am

You might be surprised by how well people respond to honesty. I was in a similar boat, a virgin until my late twenties. When I did meet someone who I had a good connection with, I had similar worries to you. That they would think I was some sort of freak, or that my years of solitude would be a red flag. But I think if you are honest about your past and your reasons, people will be pretty accepting.

13 4Rating: +9

Your better off not dating

Oct 21, 2018 at 12:17pm

Save yourself the drama and pain and just get yourself a hooker.

5 15Rating: -10

Dont

Oct 21, 2018 at 3:11pm

Why do you have to explain anything? When you find the right person, they will not judge you. They might wonder why you are such a dynamo in the bedroom :), then maybe you can tell them.

11 4Rating: +7

Me too

Oct 21, 2018 at 6:49pm

Getting close to 20

9 2Rating: +7

You just don't...

Oct 21, 2018 at 8:04pm

break into dating after 15 years, it will come naturally. Please don't be desperate and lower your standards.

12 4Rating: +8

You don’t

Oct 22, 2018 at 4:02pm

Why do you need to explain that? Explain it if you want to but it isn’t anyone’s damn business!

7 5Rating: +2

Anonymous

Oct 22, 2018 at 11:32pm

Took me 12 years (no sex during this time) before I started dating again in my mid-thirties. You know what I did those years of so called solitude? I got closer to family, friends and travelled to meet new friends. Spent ton shit of money and time on myself ok not surgery but spoilt myself with whatever I wanted. Found myself (BS) and knew I could be happy with or without someone. Had been ghosted after dates but eventually found the one for me. Shit happens for a reason then eventually good shit happens to good people.

10 2Rating: +8

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