The rabbit hole goes deeper than that. The whole issue of gender on this planet messes with my head. I want equality but is it even possible without women taking power and then men having inequality? will it just switch back and forth? Why can't there be a middle equal zone? I don't know. No one knows.

"the other woman is always the one who gets demonized?"
No,what makes yo say this?

"The man's wife takes all of her anger out on the woman"
No. She knew he was married and id it anyways.

"The man takes his anger out on the other woman."
False

The couple's friends and family vilify the other woman. She is flogged with anger and insults"
No

"while he "made a mistake".
No

" Wait, he made a choice to make a commitment to his wife. The other woman has zero responsibility to his wife or family or friends. Oh, and wait, he made a choice to have an affair. or multiple night's out with another woman or women"
Many studies and stats show that women cheat at about the same rates as men,so why make this another misandric tirade?

"So, why is the other woman the villain but the man is just flawed?"
Again,this is just another attempt to villify men,while portraying women as always being the victim.

Oh shmookie!!! Being victimized by society is soooo unfair. I should know as a middle-aged white guy, I can't get up in the morning without being accused of some kind of privileged white guy ass-holery. It's constant. So save us the whining... you obviously fucked another woman's husband, and you're getting pilfered as you bloody well should. Whereas I mind my own business and I'm pilfered just for being me.

... asks the other woman.

IMO you’re both jerks. Anyone who knowingly has an affair with someone who’s married is a jerk. The person who is the one doing the cheating is a bigger jerk, but the other person is one too.

Because the wife isn't dependent on the other woman's money, but rather that of her husband.

Because women are catty.

Why don’t you just stop being the other woman. Then you won’t be vilified. Easy peasy,no?

Your logic is incorrect. I have had it happen to me. The man definitely was not ignored in this situation. The woman, never said one word to her. Did not need to. Karma took care of that. She was despised in the city for her behaviour. Cost her dearly. The man also, had to account for his actions. If you did this to another married woman. You will get yours. And it will not be pleasant.

because men are too stupid to know any better.