Are men and women capable of just being friends?

I'm a woman and I've been trying to prove to my friends that it's possible for a woman to just be friends with a guy. So far it's been difficult, to say the least. Most guys I've met and talked to get the wrong idea and think I'm interested in them, when I'm just being polite and making conversation. Another guy friend tried to take advantage of me, steal a kiss and grope me when he had me alone. I'm seen as "a catch" I suppose, but I am still holding out hope that I will be able to meet a decent man I can be friends with somewhere, somehow. I'm sure it can be done, I've seen other women with guy friends. And I'm not interested in friends with benefits either. It would just be nice to go out with a guy, as friends, without any of the expectations of a date.


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As a guy

Dec 14, 2018 at 9:19am

Who has had several women co workers and friends of friends,confess their love for me after hanging out a couple goes both ways.
I dunno

20 8Rating: +12

Totally possible

Dec 14, 2018 at 9:30am

I'm a woman with equal amounts of male and female friends and can't imagine life any other way.


Dec 14, 2018 at 9:41am

I'm a man and to be completely honest if there's no chance of sex there's no reason to even talk to a woman. I would rather hang out with men than women any time.


Dec 14, 2018 at 10:52am

As a dude, I get this a lot.
I have many platonic female friends. And I'm straight and very sexually active.
But I'm not from here, so I can handle relationship ambiguity pretty gracefully. Unlike most North American women I've met.
They don't believe it's possible, either.

Harry said it best

Dec 14, 2018 at 11:08am

The sex part always gets in the way.

That said I have some amazing female friends. With most of them I would happily see the friendship morph into a relationship but I don’t push for that to happen.

Hope you find a giu friend to hang with. It really is fun to have friends of the opposite sex.

my thoughts

Dec 14, 2018 at 12:28pm

i hate when people say women and men can't be friends. I think only non emotionally intelligent/mature people can't be friends with the opposite sex. I realize that sounds judgmental, but it just blows my mind and makes me so sad that people miss out on the amazing connections you can have. If I had to choose my closest 10 friends, 4 are men (i'm a woman). When I was younger i had even more guy friends than girl friends (i'm now in my 40s). One of the 4 i just mentioned was someone I used to have a crush on, told him, and then was told he didn't feel the same. I moved past the crush, and he's become one of my closest friends. I'd say 90% of the friendships I now have with men (way more than 4 my closest 4) have always been platonic, but some were initially sexual in nature but have since changed and morphed into just friends. That's not to say that some of my friendships don't have chemistry-some do-but we ignore it. Others are 100% platonic. It's a spectrum-but either way-the men in my life bring rich perspective and wonderful friendships to my life-I can' t imagine my life without them. I think initially you just need to be clear that it's not a date, and then hopefully ou'll meet some cool people that value friendship.

Do you...

Dec 14, 2018 at 12:55pm

have a brother you can use ?

You're doing it wrong

Dec 14, 2018 at 1:09pm

I'm a woman. I have plenty of male friends. But I wasn't out looking for male friends specifically: I met them through school, work, mutual friends, etc. We established trust and mutual interests before becoming "friends." It's something that happens naturally over time.

You, on the other hand, are going out of your way to find a strange male to become friends with. Why do you care so much about the gender of your friends? Does it matter if someone is male or female? Do you want a MALE friend or do you want a good friend?

This post is just as ridiculous and immature as that man who tried an "experiment" to see how friendly people are but was only targeting women, complaining that random women wouldn't speak to him or sit next to him on the bus.

If you're intentions aren't to date, then why does it matter if someone is male or female? If for some silly game, you must absolutely have a male friend, and want to make sure that he's not interested in you sexually or romantically, then why not pick a gay man? By the way, some women could also be attracted to you, so maybe you should carefully vet your female friends too.


Dec 14, 2018 at 1:18pm

I find it hard to have close friendships with women unless the idea of sex is completely off the table. Either they are in a long term relationship, have outright said the idea of having sex with me is repulsive to them, or are just unattractive to me. If I really like a woman it’s hard to keep things as friends and I’ve lost some good friendships because of it. I think I’m getting better with it as I get older and coming to realize that keeping a good friendship with a woman is better than pushing things too far and having nothing at all.

23 9Rating: +14

I understand

Dec 14, 2018 at 1:38pm

and have found that it's easier to be "just" friends with a guy if he's in a relationship (but the problem there is they won't have much free time) or is gay, or is a successful player (who can have a few female friends because he's always picking up other women).
Is the reason why you specifically want male friends because you don't like women or because you can't relate to most women (tomboy)? This will change as you grow older.

When I was a teen my (3-4) close friends were girls, but now they're all guys because when your friends get married and/or have kids and you don't, they fade away.
So now I'm trying to find 1 or more female friends (cuz I already have 3 guy friends) but I specifically want to find single/kidfree females - females who have the same amount of free time.

17 8Rating: +9

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