Tinder Dating in Vancouver as a Young Guy

posted December 16th, 2018 at 10:08 PM

Dating, like most things in life, isn't a lottery- it's practical actions and results. Take Tinder. As a girl, you're guaranteed to get approximately 100x more right swipes than a guy. This means girls pick which guy they talk to, not vice versa. So what does this mean for men? You need quality and quantity. Step 1: Get a good profile. Find all the best pictures with you in them. Look up criteria for good pictures - there are tons of web pages dedicated to it. Take the ones you're missing. Order matters. Step 2: Review your profile. Run it by your close guy friends, then your close girl friends (We're going to assume you have friends here. Heck, they can be online friends.) Girls know what girls want, and the girl you want to date is going to be similar to your friends 100% of the time, at least in some ways. Put in the time. Step 3: Get tinder gold. Why? because you're not just idly swiping right and looking at pictures, you want a Girlfriend. What's a bit of money if it means a chance at something real? Step 4: Settings. Make them as open as possible. Increase age range to slightly outside your comfort zone, widest area you're okay to meet someone. After all, you're still learning how to date - don't expect to meet the girl of your dreams next week! Real dating is NOT instant gratification. Step 5: swipe fast. Just swipe right as fast as you can, swipe left if it's an instant no. It's awful to unmatch people without saying anything, but guys don't really have a choice if they're looking to meet people on Tinder. Think of it as adding your name to the list of guys women can pick. Swiping keeps you active on tinder, and since you have gold you don't need to do it that often. No point reading a ton of profiles of people you will never meet (unless you're looking for inspiration for yours). Step 6: Once you match - Ask questions. Don't ACT interested, BE interested. There's someone on the other end of the phone you might want to meet, act like it! Be your most interesting self, match her tone/vibe/energy/prose/emoji style/punctuation (whatever you want to call it) and engage with her. She knows nothing about you, so don't tell her "work was good today", tell her you're really happy about making friends with a co-worker 2 weeks ago, or that you're excited to go see a movie tomorrow. Step 7: Asks! People usually decide if they could be interested in dating very quickly. If it's going well, ask for one of her insta/snapchat/phone number. You can always ask for the others later. Once you get her phone number, give yourself a 24hr window to ask her out. By now you should know where she might like to go, maybe give her a couple of options? BE INTERESTING. If she loves coffee, don't say Starbucks, find a coffee place you've never been to and see if there's a dessert place nearby. Have a plan. Or three! Step 8: Confirm the day of. I don't mean "are we still on?", I mean "How about I pick you up at 6:45 and we can bus/cab/ride over together". Always assume she's as excited as you are until you know different - be confident! And remember, you're doing this for yourself, so smile and have fun!

19 Comments

It’s irrelevant

Dec 17, 2018 at 11:55am

In the beginning women choose who to sleep with. Men can’t. Later men choose who marry. Women can’t. There’s always balance in universe

@Its

Dec 17, 2018 at 12:12pm

True words.
The dynamics change around the age of 28-30. Before that women rule the dating world,after that it's the men.
As witnessed by the public rants everywhere by women that men never approach and that men won't "man up" and marry,all the while the women are getting more desperate with each passing year.

Anonymous

Dec 17, 2018 at 2:12pm

I got to step 2 and down voted.
Here's my steps. Step 1...go outside and meet someone. That's all. Just one step.

OP and @Its and Its

Dec 17, 2018 at 3:41pm

I think this is a great confession - good, practical advise, lots of energy and enthusiasm. I bet you do well in the dating world! Thanks for sharing something positive here.

The first 2 commenters ... the usual suspects who get to every confession (must be retired?!?) You've clearly decided you know what's up and you keep repeating the same old tropes on pretty much every confession here. Women have a best before date, their only value is when men want to f*** them, men's only value is their money, men only want hot young women blah blah blah blah. This is the way you see the world therefore this is the world you see.... so sad. What a boring, reductive, preordained world you inhabit! I'm so very happy that in my 48 years on the planet I have rarely met people like you in real life - proving to me that your way of thinking is actually in the minority YAH!

I woukd actually say

Dec 17, 2018 at 5:31pm

26 is the age where the tables begin to turn a bit.

@OP and @Its and Its

Dec 17, 2018 at 6:42pm

So true. I know several older women who are finding love and coupling up in their 60's. There is no expiration date on love.

@@Its: You are mistaken. Older women refuse to put up with the same BS that their younger selves did so they will not settle just to be in a relationship. It's just not worth it. You say women grow more desperate? Which women are you referring to? Where are they? I don't know a single older woman who is desperate to find a man and get married. Some men like to believe this about women but married men who live longer than single men.

@OP

Dec 17, 2018 at 10:04pm

I like your style! Good for you for taking the time to build a good profile and actually be interested instead of acting. One top though, offering to pick up the woman might not go over as well. As a woman who dated online, I always screened men first. That means for a first date, I would meet them somewhere public. I wouldn't want a guy to know where I live right away, and most of my friends are the same due to stalking and date rape potential. I'm now married to an awesome guy who I met on PoF in 2010 (the old fashioned way, pre-Tinder). I made the poor guy go on a daytime coffee date and a few evening drink dates beforehand to make sure he wasn't a creeper. Lucky for me he didn't seem to mind! :) Other than that it looks like you've got a solid plan. Best of luck out there! :)

Thanks for sharing

Dec 18, 2018 at 6:30am

I never knew this much effort was required to date using Tinder or online for that matter. I remember back in the day when people just went to bars or went clubbing hoping to meet someone —none of that worked for me either. I met my hubby through my brother on a large group outing...Before that, I had one boyfriend from high school and another boyfriend I met through a work function. This sums up my dating experiences from age 16 to 30.

@@OP etc

Dec 18, 2018 at 7:31am

Just because you grannies have gotten the ex husbands house and are sitting pretty,doesn't translate to women in their late 20's early 30's with no husband and the biological clock ticking away.

Haven't met any men who think like us? That's because you never meet any men,as only 17% have a favourable view on marriage....

Married men do live very slightly longer but that is a fallacy its only because they are married. Divorced men after losing their life's work and the kids to the ex wife often kill themselves or the stress wrecks their hearts. If this didn't happen,men would live pretty much the same years. After divorce men are 40% more likely to die early.

Men who didn't get married are 300% more likely to die in accidents, party too much,etc but overall it's only a couple years difference on the average,taken off. But they lived a fun life,and did whatever they wanted to. And the added bonus is they don't have a 60% chance of losing their life's work to a woman.etc.
Even at that,its only a couple years difference.