Internalized classism.

I actually get super uncomfortable when men who appear wealthy hit on me and brag about their money, accomplishments, property they own etc. I mean, of course be happy with everything you’ve really hard for. You deserve it. But it doesn’t really work well for me if a guy is trying flirt with me and uses money as a hook. You wouldn’t be able to tell if you met me in person but I grew up super super poor. I’m ok now, I got older, became educated and got a career. But by no means am I living it up. When a guy starts bragging about their money all it does is make me super uncomfortable because it’s so far removed from the way I was raised. This happened yesterday while I was on a lunch break and two men started to chat me up in a restaurant. I won’t deny that having money can work as a charm for reeling in many partners in this city. But for many who grew up poor, a potential partner having tons of money can just bring up really fucked up feelings of inadequacy.


Post a Comment


Jan 12, 2019 at 11:59am

Supposing they had a very bad accident,and hadn't worked for a year,or were put on disability for $1100 a month-they'd have zero chance,with any woman.
A woman in the same situation would have no problem meeting a guy.

Nevertheless,these guys aren't too smart,never let a woman know what cash and assets you have.
Shakespeare said it best,in King Lear,some 400 years ago: know more than what you say,show less than what you have.


Jan 12, 2019 at 12:27pm

Money doesn't make the man.
Unless that man is a douchebag, and then it makes him more of one. Much like booze or drugs.
I've had both wealth and poverty, and prefer to have much money, but I'm not ostentatious so it always surprises people.
Wealth is only a character trait for those with no character.
"Manners maketh man." - attributed to Horman of Eton College, c. 1500

Money is a boring topic

Jan 12, 2019 at 1:38pm

Those who obsess about it are boring as well.

17 6Rating: +11

I hate it too

Jan 12, 2019 at 1:40pm

But not for the reason you do. I just hate the assumption that too many people have that all women care about is how much money a guy has. I wasn’t raised in a wealthy family either, but I didn’t suffer. I’ve just never been impressed by how much money someone has because to me it’s much more important what kind of person they are. I can’t stand guys who brag about themselves period, and it seems to be a very common affliction for many of them. I might be listening politely but inside I’m thinking about how insecure he must be to feel the need to do that. So for me it’s “next!”.

20 9Rating: +11

Wish I Could Brag

Jan 12, 2019 at 2:27pm

When I talk to women,very often. I never brag about my accomplishments and assets,as I have none due to a hidden disability.
They always come up with excuses to leave.

8 8Rating: 0

Fake post....

Jan 12, 2019 at 3:01pm

it flies in the face of a woman's natural instincts.

The Sad Truth

Jan 12, 2019 at 4:45pm

Like you said, in many cases it works. I used to work in a bar in Yaletown and have seen countless woman looking for an affluent man. I became very astute to the type of woman was looking for a leg up in life and those who are there having drinks with co-workers. And don't get me started on the conversations I've overheard between woman analysing a man's potential. Ultimately Yaletown was grotesque place to work and I had to get the hell out of there. The larger tips weren't worth it.

24 8Rating: +16

Hey babe! Check Me Out.

Jan 12, 2019 at 5:46pm

I'm​ so impoverished that I go to sleep hungry everyday. I don't wear socks 'cause I can't afford them and my shoes are inadequate for the weather. The last ten bucks I had I bought some chick a coffee and she told me that she wouldn't date me because I didn't have a car. You're probably getting a little bit excited after reading this, so I guess I should go. I'd love to meet you some day and we could dive dumpsters together and just live poorly.
Oh SWEETness!

Fake Post

Jan 12, 2019 at 6:56pm

I've never written such a comment on any post ever, but I'm saying it now: This confession is fake. This story never happened. There's no way in hell that a woman gets approached by a man with money and it makes her "super uncomfortable." Bull. Shit.
There have been studies done where they show women photos of a man and ask to rate his attractiveness. First they show photos without indicating his income, then they show him with his hypothetical income written on the bottom. The men's attractiveness would be rated higher if a high income was also indicated. But it doesn't matter. Saying women value men with money is like saying "water is wet." Its obvious.
I don't know what this OP was thinking when she (maybe he?) wrote this. What was the point?


Jan 12, 2019 at 8:48pm

What a great honest post. Totally understand where you are coming from and have been there.

Join the Discussion

What's your name?