The price of self respect

Sometimes it comes down to a decision between having self respect or staying with someone you love. Anyone who’s ever had to make that choice knows how heartbreaking it can be. Just because we decide in favour of self respect doesn’t mean that we don’t suffer the grief of missing someone and the loss of our dreams for the future. For anyone who knows someone who has recently had to make such a difficult decision, please remember that telling them to just move on and get over it immediately isn’t remotely helpful. Don’t assume that they’re not hurting just because it was their decision to end things. The price of self respect can be very, very high.

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Skeptical

Jan 20, 2019 at 7:23am

I hear you, however people tend to confuse self respect for foolish pride, after they were being hurtful, manipulative, controlling, jealous, and resentful towards someone else because they couldn't own their bad behavior.

Sorry but..

Jan 20, 2019 at 7:52am

If you're not going to behave respectfully or give respect, you won't be getting it from someone else.

Choices

Jan 20, 2019 at 8:01am

If you choose to drink from the bitter cup, suck it up, and don't troll for sympathy.
Your choice, your problem.
Also, if you walk away, don't expect to get a second chance. And even if you do get one, expect to earn that trust back the hard way. Only the trusted can betray, but why trust someone who broke faith with you, and found a way to justify it to themselves? Whatever their reasoning, they'll almost certainly throw you under the bus the next time it suits them, and find a way to justify that, too.
People don't change much, if ever. Once an egotist, always an egotist.
Ironically, this is not like infidelity. "Once a cheater, always a cheater" is not necessarily true, but a serial cheater is probably going to stay consistent. Someone who tries it once and doesn't like it, will almost certainly not make that mistake again.
On the other hand, egotism and serial infidelity work pretty well together.
Egotism always works. It's 100 percent reliable.

This is...

Jan 20, 2019 at 8:05am

... ridiculous. If you make yourself suffer by ending a relationship, etc. it is your fault.

Tough crowd

Jan 20, 2019 at 12:05pm

But I totally understand. Do what you have to do to maintain your self-respect. Haters be damned.

15 7Rating: +8

@choices

Jan 20, 2019 at 1:19pm

You just described my ex so, so, perfectly.

7 6Rating: +1

I feel you

Jan 20, 2019 at 1:35pm

I also loved someone but this person hurt me, took me for granted and treated me poorly. My self-love and self-respect finally took over. I knew I had to leave because this person was never going to love me or respect me the way I wanted to be loved and respected. It hurts but you did the right thing to leave. You're on the right path to self-healing and meeting someone who will love you and respect you the way you deserve.

23 7Rating: +16

Op

Jan 20, 2019 at 3:31pm

You people are obviously the ones that got left because you’re aholes.

@ OP

Jan 20, 2019 at 7:14pm

The narcissist is usually always the first to leave when their attempts at controlling their target fail, after which they will always then attempt to vilify their victim, and play the part of the victim for themselves in order to gain sympathy, and validation from their peers.

Your Toxic Ego

Jan 20, 2019 at 7:39pm

If you had any respect for them, for yourself, or anyone else involved, you wouldn't have been looking for the greener grass outside of your current relationship at the time. You got it, exactly the way you went fishing for it. You only have yourself to blame for it not working out the way that you wanted it to, because you didn't consider the consequences of the disrespectful way that you initiated it in the first place. Truth of the matter is that you never loved them, it was only your ego that did. You were obsessed with them, and that was it. You still are in many ways. You just didn't want to have to see them fall in love with someone else because you thought you were entitled to them.

8 19Rating: -11

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