Mansplain much?

My job requires me to work face-to-face with the public for about half of my time. I was processing some paperwork for a man who came to the front desk. The paperwork in question was a quasi-legal document that required both of our signatures. He noticed my signature (printed in block letters then signed) on the paperwork and told me that my "handwriting was worse than his". (It really wasn't but, okay, whatever.) Then, while the man was scanning the paperwork to confirm that his information was correct before he signed, he asked me about my last name. It's an unusual last name, much more common on the east coast than here in the west, but easy enough to pronounce phonetically. I pronounced it for him and agreed that it was a little unusual. "Are you sure that's how you pronounce it?" he asked suspiciously. "What do you mean?" I asked, confused. Maybe he was thinking it was French or something? "Well, isn't it actually pronounced THIS way?" I looked at him for a second but couldn't tell if he was making a stupid joke or just enjoyed being a jackass. "Ummmmm, no. Pretty sure I got it right. If your information is correct, please print and sign your name here (pointing)". It's like this all the time with the people who come to the front desk for customer service (when they aren't screaming at us because we can't give them an item/service that we don't actually provide) and it is exhausting. I used to have a sense of humour about these things but I've been worn down by too many toxic interactions. I had applied to go back to school to study social work. Now I'm not so sure I want to deal with the public at all.

15 Comments

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Trust me

Apr 25, 2019 at 11:14am

Social work can be mentally exhausting.

I've had the same thing happen to me...

Apr 25, 2019 at 12:20pm

and to that I say, it's MY damn last name and I shall pronounce it however I like.

U need

Apr 25, 2019 at 12:50pm

thick skin to work customer service in Vancouver. the most snotty obnoxious pushy yet helpless people on earth

Anonymous

Apr 25, 2019 at 1:34pm

Lots of men have trouble communicating. Sounds like he's one. I imagine he actually thought he was being "helpful".

Seriously?

Apr 25, 2019 at 1:37pm

You're too miserable, self conscious, and easily offended over nothing to work in public. You should work as a night auditor, or even a night janitor, where people don't have to worry about walking on eggshells around you.

Hmmm

Apr 25, 2019 at 2:04pm

Take a different example. I think it's fair to wonder why Brett Favre pronounces his last name Farv and not Fav-ruh or Fav-ray. It would be horrible to declare someone was pronouncing it wrong but surely it's OK to just bring it up.

Similar experience

Apr 25, 2019 at 3:06pm

That dude was an obnoxious prick. Maybe he was being sexist. But I have experienced the same thing coming from women as well (I'm a woman). These pretentious people think they're all that, and enjoy knocking down other people. In my experience, they're usually elitist and priviledged (as well as insecure). They look down on you if you're young, poor, female, inexperienced, etc. They think you're ignorant and powerless so they can do whatever they want. I usually reply with something snarky. Then, they look at me like I was being rude. Thankfully, I don't have a job that requires me to be polite with these people. Oh, the hubris!

I hate

Apr 25, 2019 at 6:46pm

Womansplaining- using made up terms or opinions and presenting them as facts,getting upset over others who don't conform to their anti male prejudices,and then feeling superior about it.

???

Apr 25, 2019 at 7:07pm

If you don’t want to deal with the public why study social work? Unless you are some sort of backroom statistician you will be working with the public.

It’s called social work for a reason?

Julius

Apr 25, 2019 at 8:28pm

If it was some hunk of a guy you'd be all like.."yeah maybe I have been pronouncing it wrong all these years"

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