Of the last couple years of my life. The days that were not blue it was because red was being an opposing color of happiness, wonderment and beauty of it all. Red seems to know that blue is a sad boy, so red is the color that makes me happy when red is at home and can be available to play, hang out or just shoot the shit. Yup wish red were here today.

And it can get fixed with meds, exercise and counselling.
Worked for me.

Tried many different ways to comfort my hurting soul and then some Indigenous Elders put their arms around me and invited me into their ancient curriculum. That's what helped me more than anything previous. But the Indigenous elders also say: "My way is not the only way. No one need do it my way; but everyone must find the way the worlds for them."

I’ve been feeling this way for months. Today I got ready for a workout and the tears wouldn’t stop, it was a weird feeling, seeing as I’m never the emotional type (I’m blessed to have amazing coworkers). Actually, truth be told, I’ve had that happen to me multiple times, where I was eating healthy or getting ready for a workout, and the feelings you just described were too much for me. I’m a personal trainer and I eat healthy, I surround myself with positive people, and I know there’s something off within my brain. I know this may sounds weird but reading this confession somehow brought the feeling of community back to me. It’s nice to know others are fighting through this and I’m not alone. I believe you’ll get your spark back again. In fact, I don’t know you but I know you will be back stronger than before. Some of the most successful stories are the ones where there’s huge setbacks and that “I’m in a dark pit” feelings...before something big happens in that person’s life. Research it, some of the most successful people have stories where they were depressed or going through a rough time before their big idea, promotion or recognition, and successful milestones. One thing I have been reminding myself everyday (for the past few months) is this: “when you’re in a dark place, you sometimes tend to think you’ve been buried; perhaps you’ve been planted. Bloom.”

A horrible place to be. Good Luck.

Sometimes a black dog comes to visit, as Winston Churchill called it.
It's lovely how people offer simplistic advice, like you could flip a switch. Not really. Unless you take the chemical route, which carries a price uncertain and changeable. Because those meds have different side effects, depending on your particular combination of genetics, lifestyle, microbiome, physiology and neurochemistry...and also over time.
But I appreciate their sentiment. They mean well.
I was never willing to take that risk myself. Friends who tried it (because like attracts like, among depressives) reported changes in personality, functionality, reality... Not acceptable. Without my persona and intellect, I am nothing. Which I'll be in due course, anyway, but why rush things? Not what I'm in this universe for, I don't think.
The obstacle is the way. After decades of living with this (since puberty), I choose things that help me deal.
The company of those who love me. According to my definition, where they would lie, cheat, steal, kill, and die for me, and I would do the same. And the company of dogs, to remind me what Zen is. And 10 miles a day, most days, of HIIT hot cardio. And a low-sugar diet, no alcohol or drugs, a pretty monastic lifestyle...
And still, sometimes even all that is not enough to keep the blackest night at bay.
Some days are better than others. I wish you better days.

Girl, you just said something so beautiful there. Maybe I’ve been planted. I’ll tell myself that!

Love that!

This is an apt description of the shades of blue I'm experiencing, too. It's good to know I'm not alone.

I've got those can't focus on work blues. I've got those can't even watch Netflix blues. I've got those can't bother to make food blues. I've got those nothing compares 2u blues.

I'm swimming in a cerulean sea of sadness. Not waving, but drowning.

Ceiling.
Sir that sounds like music !!!